#and i will appreciate it more with that context
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This! Sparknotes are there for a reason:
To give you notes and context on the story. Not a replacement.
You've still gotta put in the work by reading the whole thing. If someone came up to me and told me that they used ChatGPT to help them read and understand one of my novels, I'd call them out and not consider them a true fan. I also grew up reading tons of books, even the boring ones at school as they were required in class.
I've read Macbeth, Shakespeare, some Greek mythology at school and then Lord of The Rings without those fancy schmancy tech. It's how I was inspired to appreciate and research more about them. I certainly won't trust any AI gadgetry to help me read The Bible or Quran, even though I never read them, 'coz they end up leaving out certain context and misleading the reader with false info.
There is a reason why they're written in Ol' English 'coz it is supposed to be a relic of the olden times. Artistotle is supposed to encourage you to be analytical as he is a philosopher, after all. If you want something to be translated in standard or modern English, I remember there'd be versions of classics that are written in modern English. Go pick up graphic novel adaptations of those books. Still, I'd recommend you do research in the background.
If I were to teach literature to these Gen Alpha college kids (a.k.a. the iPad generation), I'd get to incorporate art and a bit of modern humor to help them understand the lessons more. Maybe get them to watch the earlier seasons of Clone High, Hetalia, Persepolis, Gods School and Time Squad to spark their interest in history and literature.
what is HAPPENING
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I read your other Hiori nsfw writing... Can you write more nsfw of him?
✦ 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐢𝐨𝐫𝐢 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝!
who knew your 6ft strong soccer player would fold for you?
context ☀︎* - j*rking hiori off until he cries!
a/n- as somewhat promised, two whole posts in one week!! anyways how have your winter breaks been? i’ve just been shopping the entire time lololol. I finally updated my masterlist so check it out if you’d like! p.s this is barely proof read sooo
✦*✰ content warnings!! all minors are aged up! dacryphilla (crying), h*ndjob, overstimulation, size difference if you squint, whimpering, praising, established relationship, swearing like once, hickeys
follows and reblogs are appreciated! masterlist
“n-ngh♡!! sl-slow..! down-“
hiori squirms, reaching his hands out to tangle in your hair. his legs closing subconsciously so you had to force his legs open again, the incoming stimulation from your hand around him and the kisses you’re leaving on hiori’s neck
“m-mnph-! s-shit.. s’too much-♡!”
you watch as hiori starts to tear up — if you could even reach his face, you’d kiss all those tears off in a heartbeat. hiori trembles as you rub your thumb on his sensitive tip. how many times has he came already? one? two? four?
“hiori.. you’re too good to me! you’re doing soo.. good for me”
hiori nearly cums hearing that — but you do notice how much pre-cum he’s leaking! you can’t help but giggle at how much of a mess he is now. he sobs out a whimper, listening to you laugh at him. you look up at hiori, his chest covered in hickeys. his stomach covered in his cum.
“do you feel good?”
“y-yes! m-mhm… hic! superrrgood..”
#✦*✿ mshinemuscat#☀︎*✿mdni#blue lock#blue lock smut#blue lock x reader#blue lock x you#hiori yo x reader#hiori smut#hiori x reader#bllk hiori#blue lock hiori#hiori yo
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Alastor X Reader
Context: When you discover it's Alastor's birthday, you want to suprise him with a thoughtful gift. But would it be one he'd like? And how would he show his appreciation?
Part 2/2
You had to be very careful bringing Alastor's gift back home, especially considering you were planning on giving him a pet. Getting her home was easy, and thankfully, due to noone being in the hotel lobby, you were able to slip upstairs to your room without anyone noticing. The lady at the ranch had given you a whole box of things to look after her before she was gifted to Alastor, food, toys? A harness, all sorts of things, including a bed to sleep on inside her carrying case. Hiding her in your room, you made sure she was happy, watered and fed before you left the room, and luckily, she was fast asleep when you left her. This was the time you took to help Charlie with her planning and setting up. But, when you did spot Charlie running down the hall, she was actually more suprised to see you than you were her.
"Oh! Y/N! Perfect! I really need your help!"
"Ok, what can I do?"
"Alastor is still in the hotel, but I know he'll come in and see what we're up to if he hears us! Please! Please can you take him out until we're finished? We want everything to be perfect!"
"Ok, sure, I can do that. When do you want us to come back?"
"I'll text you when we're ready, how does that sound?"
"Yeh, I'm fine with that. Alright, I'll go ask him"
"Thank you thank you thank you!!!"
And off she bounded, straight back down the hall. For the princess of hell, she was surprisingly adorable. Chuckling to yourself, you walked up to Alastor's door and knocked.
"Ah! Good day to you my dear. What a pleasant surpise"
"It's nice to see you too Alastor. I was just wondering if you wanted to go for a walk with me?"
"My, I would love to. Let me just grab my staff. Say, before we go, might I borrow you for a moment?"
"Yeh, sure. (Closing his door as you enter his room) What do you need?"
He approaches you, desire in his eyes, taking in all of your features.
"Why.....I need you......my darling......I dare say, we were so rudely interrupted yesterday, and I would very much like to return to what I was planning on doing"
"Oh really...I can't possibly imagine what you mean by that....why don't you show me?...."
"With pleasure....."
Taking you by the waist, he has you against him, hands resting on his strong chest, feeling the warmth of his body radiating into your palms. Keeping searing eye contact with you, he's slow as he leans in, tilting his head to the side, and locking his soft lips with yours. Oh wow he was good. He captured your tounge and lips in a carnal hunger, craving the touch and taste of your lips, deepening each moment, growing more and more passionate. His hand slid up your neck and into your hair, keeping you as close to him as possible. It made you feel almost dizzy, he had literally taken your breath away. When the kiss slowed down, and he pulled away just a little, both you and him were a slignty breathless. But his smile never left, and his eyes still burned for you.
".....Oh......wow Alastor.....I never knew you could kiss like that"
"That is something for only you to know my dear.....I have dreamed of your taste for many days and nights.....and yet they were sweeter than I could have possibly fathomed"
"How long have you been imagining me?"
"Too long my dear.....too long. Now then! Shall we away? I know of a very pleasant route that can take us past Cannibal Town. Would you like that"
"That sounds nice, lead the way. Oh, and Alastor?"
"Hm?"
"Next time you kiss me like that, make it a little longer..."
"Oh ho, don't you worry my dear......I plan too...."
Neither of you saw Charlie jumping for joy when she saw you and Alastor leave, now she could set up for the party properly, without the possibility of him walking in on the suprise. You and Alastor meanwhile, had been walking for about an hour now, but neither of you noticed how quick the time had gone. You were just enjoying eachothers company, hearing eachothers stories, walking to the main square of Cannibal Town.
"I say, I see Rosie over there, shall we say hello?"
"I'd love too"
During the walk, your arm was looped in with his, and that didn't change, even as you both approached Rosie on tne sidewalk.
"Good day Rosie!"
"Alastor! Hello sweetie, back to see me so soon?"
"But of course, it's always a pleasure to see you. And I have with me Y/N"
"Hi Y/N! Gosh I haven't seen you in such a long time. How are you honey?"
"I'm good thank you. It's nice to see you again"
"Same to you too honey. Say? Isn't it someone's special day today? C'mon Alastor!"
"Ah yes....I am aware it is my birthday Rosie"
"Ain't you doing anything to celebrate?"
"I dare say, the only two people in the hotel who know of this, are dear Y/N hear, and an unfortunate dim wit who also resides in the hotel"
"But ain't you gunna do anything for it?"
"If I am being truthful Rosie, just walking through the city and conversing with Y/N, has actually been one of the most enjoyable ways I have spend my birthday, dead or alive"
Awww, that's so sweet of him to say. He's such a gentleman.
"Well aren't you a darling Alastor! (Looks between you and him) It seems you may may have found a lovely lady to finaly spend some quality time with. And I always thought you were an ace in the hole"
"A what now?"
"Never mind sweetie. I've got to go see some people who need my help in Cannibal Town, I'll see you two lovelies later!"
She happily walked down the street. You couldn't help but smile up at Alastor.
"My my, what's made me lucky enough to witness such a beautiful smile?"
"The way you just spoke about me just then. It was wonderful"
"Aha, I always make sure you know how appreciated you are my darling. Now, shall we make our way back to the hotel? It's starting to get dark"
"Wait, not yet"
Realizing Charlie hasn't texted you yet, you luckily thought of a plan B for this on the way, remembering to sneek just a little something into your pocket before heading out with Alastor.
"Why ever not my dear?"
"You've not said anything about your birthday today Alastor, but I want you to know that I haven't forgotten to get you anything"
"I know my dear, but I do not expect anyone to say or give me anything, simply because I was born on this day"
"You say that, but I just wanted to give you a little something"
"Oh ho my dear, I do believe your kiss was more than enough as a gift for me today"
"That's so sweet Alastor. But, I'm still going to give you this anyway"
"I say, what is it?"
You held in your hand, giving it to him, a small box.
"It's not much, but I used to make things out of resin, make them 3D and paint them to look like everyday things. This is just something I made that reminded me of you"
Opening the box, his eyes grew at the sight of the little home made keying. Lifting it out of the box with his finger, it was a 3D version of a bowl of Jambalaya, in a circular clear resin. It looked like Jambalaya inside a clear marble.
"Oh my dear.....it's wonderful"
"I'm glad you like it"
"I love it. Thank you!"
He couldn't contain his happiness, and pulled you in for a quick hug.
"I shall place this on my staff. I dare day it gives it a touch of class, don't you think?"
"I do, it goes together nicely. Oh, I'm getting a text"
Yes, Charlie was finished, and at just the right time too.
"You wanna head back then Alastor?"
"With pleasure my dear"
It was dusk by the time you both arrived back at the hotel, arms still linked, and his smile larger than ever. It was dark inside from your view of the window, but you did glance Nifty's head, quickly being pulled down by Angel.
"May I confess something to you before we enter my dear?"
"Of course you can"
"I didn't always enjoy my birthday when I was a child. I had not experienced a party or a true celebration, but I always did have a wonderful time thanks to my mother. I'd just like to say thank you, for helping me remember that this day can contain happiness"
"Your welcome Alastor"
Reaching your hand up, you hold his cheek, stroking it with your thumb. His eyes fluttered shut, and his ears twisted together, he even leaned into your touch. Opening the door for you like a true gentleman, your the first to walk into the dark lobby, followed by him.
"SUPRISE!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!"
The voices of Charlie, Angel and Nifty all scream when you come in, turning the lights on to reveal the lobby, decorated just like a club from the 1920's, including everyone dressed in their 1920's outfits.
"Oh my word!! I was truly not expecting this! My dear Y/N, did you know that Charlie and the others had prepared this suprise?"
"I might have done"
"Oh you are a sly one...I love it. Thank you very much everyone, this is a wonderful suprise. It truly feels like I'm back in New Orleans. I say? Are those deviled eggs? And dutchess potatoes and-huh! Is that a roasted duck with a candle on the top to have instead of a cake?!"
Alastor can't help but be drawn to the table laden with foods of his memories, smiling and chuckling as he scans them all. Charlie slipped over to you, nudging you on the shoulder.
"He loves it! Thank you for the suggestion Y/N, it's perfect"
"No worries Charlie. You and the others did a great job at decorating. Aaand I can already see Angel admiring himself in the mirror"
"Oh yeh, he loves costume. Alright! Let's get this party started!"
That evening actually went really well, Alastor carved the duck, everyone ate the food, Angel and Husk got tipsy at the bar, and Nifty liked cleaning up behind anyone who was messy. Alastor still had big shiny eyes at the decor and nibbles, it truly did remind him of home. And thankfully, Lucifer was there but stayed a good distance away from Alastor, and also you. Your not suprised though, you did shout at him. You were actually quite shocked he didn't hit you with one of his wings, or try to kill you. As a sinner who spoke to the king of hell like that, you half expected to be at least suffering with a few bruises. You were stood laughing with Alastor, when Angel and Husk stumbled over, drinks in hand.
"Happy birthday smiles! How'd yah like my outfit? Pretty sexy huh?"
"You seem rather intoxicated there Angel. But yes, your attire does suit you splendidly"
"Thanks! Hey uh, I've got your present hear smiles! Hear yah go! I hope you like it!"
He hands Alastor a box with a ribbon, and upon opening it, Alastor chuckles and shakes his head.
"Angel Angel Angel..."
"What? Don't yah like it?"
Angel asks as Alastor pulls it out to have a better look, at a custom made cooking apron with his name on, and a picture of the map of New Orleans.
"It's marvellous my good man. I shall very much take pleasure in using this the next time I prepare my signature dish"
"Nice!"
"And what about you Husk? Did you get me anything"
"You own my soul. I ain't gotta get you shit"
"Aha! As humorous as ever my good man!"
"C'mon Angel. I need another drink"
You weren't suprised Husk didn't get him anything, He hates him. Next, Charlie and Vaggie came up to you and Alastor.
"Hi! I've got you a birthday present too Alastor!"
"That is very kind of you Charlie"
She excitedly hands him a small box, Vaggie on the other hand just looks away with a grumpy face. Just like Husk, Vaggie doesn't like him either.
"My my! How delightful! This is just what I was attempting to acquire on my last visit to town! Thank you Charlie"
"Your welcome Alastor! I know you said you needed a monocle cleaning kit, and I managed to find one!"
"I shall use it regularly. You have my thanks"
As Alastor chats with Charlie and Vaggie, a small hand takes yours and pulls you towards the end of the food table.
"Lucifer?"
"Hey. How are you?"
"Fine thanks. What's up?"
"Listen, I uh...I just wanna say sorry about the last time we spoke"
"Don't be, it's fine. Water under the bridge"
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yeh, no worries Lucifer. Today's about celebrating. No need to think or worry about squabbles or arguments that happened"
"Oh! Thank you! I swear, I thought you'd tear me a new one if I came up to you today"
"Really? I'm suprised you didn't do the same. Your Lucifer Morningstar, and I'm just a sinner"
"Oh no no no! I wouldn't do that. Besides, I wouldn't do that to a friend"
"Thanks Lucifer. Your my friend too. So? Do you have anything to give Alastor?"
"(Grumbles) Not a gift....but I suppose......I can be......nice? To him?"
"It's the thought that counts Lucifer, trying to be nice is better than round 2. Come on then"
Begrudgingly, Lucifer does come back with you, just as Charlie and Vaggie walk away.
"My dear....oho! Why, if it isn't the tiny king? I dare say, I didn't see you there at first..all the way down there!"
"Oh yeh?! Well-"
He stops himself, taking a breath and putting on a smile.
"Yeh, I'm am short aren't I? But you know what they say, big things come in small packages, Ha! I uh....ehem....I wish you....a happy birthday......"
"My oh my? What a suprisingly thoughtful thing to say. One might think you were incapable of speaking to me without venom spitting from your lips"
"No no, I uh......can be nice.....so, anyway, happy birthday or whatever. I've gotta go!"
He sped over to Charlie so quick, you could tell he was gritting his teeth and trying his hardest not to tear Alastor a new one. But your proud that he tried.
"Isn't that nice? Charlie, Vaggie and Angel getting you birthday presents, and Lucifer wishing you a happy birthday too"
"I am rather stunned I must say. I half expected it from Charlie, but I was pleasantly surprised by Angel. One might think it was a tacky gift, but it has character. And as for little Lucifer? I believe that was far more entertaining than watching Vox loose his internet connection! Aha!"
"But are you enjoying your party?"
"Oh yes, absolutely. I'm not one for a crowd, but this is rather pleasant. And the food hear is very tasteful. Would you care for an oyster rockefeller?"
"No thank you, I'm ok. But Alastor?"
"Yes?"
"I was just wondering, if maybe we could go to your room for a moment?"
"Of course my darlin-Oh! Ooh...do you wish to 'share' some quality time? Because if that is the case, I am more than happy to oblige"
"Well, you may want to after"
"After? Hm? Now I am even more intrigued. Please, lead the way my dear"
You and him slip away up the stairs, and down the hallway to his room.
"I'll see you in there Alastor. I've just got to grab something"
"Of course, I shall await you"
Quickly, you run to your room, and see your gift for him has woken up, and is in a happy, playful mood.
"Alright little lady, time to meet your new daddy"
Keeping her in the carrier, you place a blanket over and carry her through the hallways, into Alastor's room.
"So my dear, do you care to explain the sneaking around your......I say?......what is that you are placing on the floor? And why has it got a blanket over it?"
"Well, the thing is Alastor, that little keyring I gave you wasn't your main present"
"Oh really? But I did enjoy it so! It's wonderful and I truly treasure it, because you were the wonderful lady who made it for me"
"I know Alastor, and that so sweet to hear. But........if you take a peak in hear, you'll see your main present....."
"Ooooh! How thrilling! (Gets on his knees and pulls away the blanket) It seems there is something moving in hear, let me just open this little door, and-"
He gasps. Unable to take his eyes off the little moving creature inside the carrier. His hands cover his mouth, a small tear running down his cheek, he looks so happy.
"Oh....oh my darling......this is the best gift I have ever received...."
He reaches into the carrier, carefully pulling out the little animal, cradling her in his arms.
"Are you happy?"
"I've never been happier my dear. I can't believe you've got me a baby alligator!"
"You like her then?"
"It's a girl?!"
"Yep. I know you prefer girls to boys in any animal or person, it made sence to get you a female"
"Oh.....she's perfect! I don't know how I can ever repay you"
"No need, she's a birthday present. And I hope you have fun taking care of her. Oh! She hasn't got a name yet, you can name her if you like"
"How wonderful! Let's see.....I think she looks like an.........Abigail! Yes! It's suits her, Abigail it is"
He happily tickles her smooth belly, her little tail wiggles as he does, almost as if she could laugh. His smile has never been bigger, and his eyes are filled with love. Sometimes, when times are tough, having a pet that loves you unconditionally is exactly what you need. He looks like a proud dad, placing Abigail on the floor, and letting her sniff and walk around his room and swamp area, this place was perfect for her, it won't take her long to settle in at all.
"Awwww, she's already playing in the water. She was cute when I picked her up, but now she's even cuter. Don't you think Alas-"
Very unexpectedly, Alastor grabs you by the waist, spins you around, bends you down as he holds you, pressing his lips you yours as your eyes flutter shut. He kisses you and holds you so romantically, it makes you feel lighter than air. Slowly, he let's you stand back up, still holding you in his arms.
"I never expected I gained such a romantic gentleman. I've never been kissed like that before"
"Trust me when I say, this will be a recurring and very pleasurable moment we shall share together. I can promise you that. Infact, would you like to share my bed this evening?"
"Really? Sharing your bed?"
"I simply wish to hold you and kiss you to the point you feel flush and faint in my embrace. I'd like to....quite literally take your breath away....."
"Any woman would be mad not to want that, ok. But aren't you going to be busy with Abigail? She is a baby after all"
"Worry not my darling, I am very good at caring for animals like her, she shall be happy and comfortable by the time me and you are both curled up in my bed"
"Has anyone ever told you, your a really sweet man?"
"Only you my dear, only you. (Sweet kiss to your lips). Now! I do believe I should introduce little Abigail hear, to the rest of the hotel! She will be living here after all!"
"What do you think the reactions of the others will be?"
"There's only one way to find out....."
Picking up Abigail, he ran to the staircase so fast, your hair blew in the wind. You just laugh, seeing how excitable he was at having a pet, it made you feel amazing. You smile walking to the staircase, and leaning against the banister at the top, watching and chuckling at Alastor below. He's holding Abigail up in his arms so proudly, showing her to everyone. Charlie, Lucifer and Angel actually think she's cute, stroking her head and belly. Husk hides behind the bar, swearing and shouting at the sight of an alligator in the hotel, Pentious and Vaggie keep their distance, looking a little sheepish, and Nifty sits on Alastor's shoulder, cooing at Abigail. This was definitely going to be an interesting new time in the hotel, an alligator? Alastor with an alligator? Let's see what will happen.
Link to part 1
#alastor#alastor x y/n#alastor x you#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel x y/n#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel
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Inflection, Context, and Elven: Lavellan’s Veilguard Ending (romance state)
Lately, I’ve seen quite a bit of criticism directed at a romanced Lavellan on my dash - particularly in the Veilguard ending, interpreting her as needy, egotistical, or entitled.
And I am wondering: Did we watch the same ending? (I find it fascinating how differently people interpret the same moments - such a reflection of the human experience.) And I couldn't help myself! I felt compelled to share my interpretations so I punched this out the last few days.
The sticking point seems to be Lavellan’s words, especially the ones spoken in Elven.
It seems like a common interpretation of Lavellan’s words here are:
“It won’t be terrible if you’re with me.” (Implying possessiveness or entitlement - and that she alone will make it better.)
The game’s delivery offers no inflection on any word though. For me, it’s always been:
“It won’t be terrible if you’re with me.”
It’s subtle, but very different. This is just one micro-example of how much nuance is packed into the dialogue in the Veilguard ending. These lines shouldn’t be taken in isolation - especially not the Elven ones. They should be understood in the context of what Solas says to Lavellan in Elven just before, and beyond that, within the history established in Inquisition and Trespasser.
Indulgent Solas x Lavellan post ahead.
Note: I respect and appreciate all Solas ships and I will never post negativity towards other interpretations in this space. Everyone deserves to enjoy their creativity and find joy in their community. There’s more than enough Solas to go around. As for Lavellan’s portrayal in VG, it's not perfect. I understand the devs had the impossible task of balancing every interpretation of her. Some dialogue between Rook and Lavellan took me out of gameplay a bit. But I recognized then they had to condense countless versions of her into one, and perfection wasn’t possible. In general I have honest criticisms about the game but try to keep my posts positive overall.
Still here? Excellent. (And sorry, it's another long post.)
"Elven is often a game of intents, not direct mapping of phonetic meaning." The language doesn’t rely on straightforward translations of sounds or words into specific meanings. Instead, it operates on a deeper level, where intent and context carry as much weight.
Earlier in the game, when Solas confronts Elgar’nan, he says: “I must speak to you in this tongue. It seems Elven is beyond your grasp.” This insult implies that Elgar’nan has lost the ability to understand the nuanced, metaphorical nature of the language. Elven relies on shared understanding, rhythm, intent, to convey its full meaning. By Lavellan and Solas choosing to speak Elven to each other it's an acknowledgement of their shared understanding - a connection rooted in their history going back to Inquisition.
Which is why I embrace it in my interpretations.
I disliked that Veilguard kept out the Elven words and left only the English translations in. They can be found here: (Elven Language - Dragon Age Wiki) But for funsies, let's take Lavellan’s actual Elven dialogue and translate it literally: Banal nadas. Ar lath ma, vhenan. We already know from Inquisition that Banal nadas translates roughly to "Nothing is inevitable" - the same phrase Solas uses when confronting the Nightmare Demon. So Lavellan is saying: "Nothing is inevitable. I love you, my heart." The gall of this woman!
Since I do my best to keep my posts playing in the game’s sandbox, I’m going to just look at what the game tells us the translations are and not get into actual translations (others have done that far better than I ever could). There are some great fandom language resources linked at the end of this post.
Let's start where Lavellan enters and speaks in the common tongue:
This is personal and expansive. On one level, she’s speaking as someone Solas has wronged, reminding him of the pain he’s caused her directly. But on another, she’s channeling the voices of countless others whose lives were affected by him and who will be shattered by his actions. It’s a challenge that blends her role as both an individual and the Inquisitor.
It’s also not a condemnation. Lavellan doesn’t lash out or accuse him of being irredeemable. Instead, she questions him, cutting through to reach the man beneath. She’s speaking to Solas (wisdom).
"Vhenan" is acknowledging his love for her but it’s also symbolic of his heart, the part of himself he’s buried and tried to ignore, suddenly reappearing. Solas has spent much of his journey detached and isolated, removing his heart metaphorically to push forward with his plans without the weight of emotional ties. Lavellan’s presence makes it impossible for him to keep it hidden. His heart is right there, exposed and speaking. And the ellipsis - so many words unsaid.
Immediately Solas looks down (I read it as shame). It’s a reaction back to what he said in Trespasser: that he would not have her see what he becomes. And yet, here she is. She sees him, the terrible path he has chosen, the blood on his hands, the awful things he has done, and what he’s about to do. In that moment, his shame is palpable - because Lavellan is one person he couldn’t bear to face in this state.
And Lavellan doesn’t hesitate. Her next words are as much about holding him accountable as they are about reminding him that there is still another path.
This isn’t some starry-eyed, naïve Inquisitor we’re dealing with (at least mine isn’t). Lavellan is fully aware at this point. But her stance is clear: no one is beyond redemption, not even the Dread Wolf himself. And she wasn’t the only one – this message is repeated throughout the game by others.
Her words challenge the belief that has kept Solas shackled to his path. He’s convinced himself that his guilt and mistakes are too great, that there’s no turning back, and that the only option is to see his destructive plans through to the bitter end.
She doesn’t beg or demand or frame it in a way that’s grand and sweeping – she simply says “you’re wrong.”
She’s not trying to erase his mistakes or pretend they don’t exist. She's saying, Yes, you’ve done terrible things, but that doesn’t mean you’re beyond the reach of change.
Lavellan’s journey as Inquisitor began with the Anchor - a mark born of Solas’s mistakes and choices. From the moment she touched his orb (yes, it sounds dirty), her path became entwined with his. This isn’t Lavellan selfishly claiming Solas’s path; it’s an acknowledgment that their journeys have run parallel.
Their connection was forged long before either fully understood its implications. Lavellan’s work to stabilize Southern Thedas mirrors Solas’s aim to restore a broken world, including the burdens of being forced to take on titles and labels. She is revealing her own struggles with devastating, blood-soaked choices - choices that, like his, have carried profound consequences.
Solas believes he’s been walking this path alone, but Lavellan shows him she's been walking alongside him this whole time. Now, as their paths converge again, this is a reminder of the power of connection and the burdens they’ve both borne. He's actually not alone.
Her words also carry an unspoken promise: she is ready to continue to bear the consequences with him. She knows the road ahead is painful and fraught with difficulty, but she is steadfast.
Why do I feel that people sometimes forget Lavellan’s role as Inquisitor? She wasn’t defined by Solas; she was the leader of a powerful military and political organization, forced to make horrible decisions. Whether you choose the mages or templars in Inquisition, you doom thousands to torment and death. The Empress of Orlais can live or die based on the Inquisitor’s choices. And if you’re like me and made the wrong calls on the Dalish clan war table operation, her own clan can be murdered and wiped out. (Yes, I’m still haunted by that moment.) Her hands have blood on them too. This makes me wonder: does some criticism of the Solas/Lavellan romance stem from failing to see Lavellan as her own person? I love Lavellan for who she is as the Inquisitor - not because of Solas. Likewise, Solas is fascinating on his own. Their romance is one layer of the story, not the foundation of either character. Sometimes it feels like there are even some Solas/Lavellan lovers who have a tendency to overlook the depth and individuality of both characters outside of their romance.
Solas’s statement is a raw admission of all the guilt he carries for his deceptions and the pain he has caused her - lying to her about his identity, betraying her trust - not just as the Inquisitor, but as a person he loves.
His words are not an attempt to seek forgiveness but an acknowledgment of the truth - no matter how painful it is for them both. He knows his choices have caused devastation to the world and to her specifically. He's exposing the full weight of his dual burden: the grand, world-altering consequences of his plans and the personal betrayal of the woman he loves, who trusted him.
Perhaps, on some level, he hopes that reminding Lavellan of his lies and treachery will convince her to abandon him, sparing her further pain. His guilt and self-loathing are so entrenched that the idea of being forgiven - or even supported – either confounds him or terrifies him.
But Solas’s confession is not just a shield to push her away. It’s also an invitation for her to see him - not the wise, compassionate companion she knew, but the flawed, broken man beneath.
This moment to me shows that Solas still values Lavellan’s understanding (we also saw it in his letter to her). He doesn’t diminish the weight of his actions but wants her to see the cost of his deception - not just for her, but for himself. To Solas, his betrayal is unforgivable.
And yet - this "selfish" woman dares to forgive him anyway.
Forgiveness is an act of wisdom because it requires understanding - and she reflects that wisdom right back at him.
"All you have to do is stop" is heavy with meaning. Yes, on the surface, it’s a plea to stop tearing down the Veil, to reconsider the destruction. But it’s also a plea for him to stop running, to stop isolating himself, and to stop punishing himself for his failures. She’s asking him to step out of the shadow of his self-loathing and see that there’s another way forward, not by demanding or commanding, but by offering him compassion (forgiveness). (Cole, I miss you.)
But Solas’s guilt and self-loathing run deep.
With these words, Solas apologizes to his heart - hardening it once more. For a moment, it had softened, cracked open. But he shuts the door.
The bow that accompanies his words is loaded. A bow carries layers of meaning depending on context - reverence, respect, gratitude, apology, greeting or farewell, a spiritual act, acknowledgment, loyalty, mourning, or even a romantic gesture. Solas’s bow can mean all of these.
He is physically reinforcing the gravity of his apology. It’s a solemn moment. He is bowing to her strength, to all she has endured because of him. And when he calls her "vhenan," it is personal. It's an apology to her and to his own heart for not choosing the life he wanted to have with her. “...to stay by your side as Solas...as I wanted.”
The bow also carries guilt. He is acknowledging the pain he’s caused and humbling himself before her. And his eyes in the animation during this moment – I saw haunted, tormented, tired eyes – the eyes of a man grappling with the weight of his choices and the thought that he cannot accept redemption, even if it’s offered freely.
Time for a an indulgent moment - a bow can also symbolize acceptance. What if, in that moment, it’s not just an apology? What if it’s Solas saying, “You’re right. You have walked this path with me. I acknowledge that.” The bow could be a tacit agreement - a recognition of a future with her. What if he’s asking: I’m sorry, but I can’t stop, are you still coming with me? And Lavellan’s eyes right after? She looks down, like she’s contemplating this - what if he tears the Veil down? What happens next? What do I do? Anyway, maybe I indulged with this thought a little too much.
But, as I’ve said before, it takes a village to stop a Solas. Cue Morrigan and Mythal - but I’m not diving into that dialogue rabbit hole in this post.
But this scene with Mythal is important. Lavellan has just watched the man she loves completely crumble in front of Mythal. He’s bent over in grief/pain, utterly vulnerable. She hears him say, in anguish, “The things that I have done.” She sees him lift the dagger - perhaps to surrender it, to shield himself from Mythal, or even as a plea to Mythal to end his torment. Whatever the intent, Lavellan is witnessing the rawest, most broken Solas. His guilt is overwhelming, and this is the first time she’s truly seeing the full weight of it laid bare (as is Rook). It’s a moment of heavy sadness for her – and for us as players.
This scene seems to have created a universal understanding among players who love Solas, regardless of who you ship Solas with. We are all witnessing Solas in this moment of pure vulnerability. Let’s honor that shared empathy.
Solas is bent over with the emotional collapse of centuries of obligation and guilt coming to the surface. Mythal’s departure leaves Solas vulnerable, stripped of the purpose that has guided him for so long. He is alone in his pain.
For Lavellan, can you imagine the helplessness? All she can do is offer her presence, understanding, and faith in him afterward. That might feel like so little in the face of such immense pain, but it’s all she has to give.
Where Mythal’s words, spoken in the common tongue, are authoritative and final, Lavellan’s are intimate and personal. Her choice to speak Elven reflects her desire to meet Solas where he is - connecting with him on an intimate level.
Only after Mythal has left him exposed - that Lavellan uses the Elven language. In this moment, stripped of his defenses, he is finally open to hearing and feeling the full significance of the words and their intent.
Lavellan’s words challenge the notion that fate is immutable or inevitable. When she says, “there is no fate...,” she isn’t diminishing everything else in favor of her love; she’s rejecting the tyranny of inevitability. Her words assert that choices - rooted in love, connection, and shared purpose - have the power to shape their path forward. She reframes love as a force just as powerful as fate, capable of creating meaning and direction where there once seemed to be none.
Atonement
And at this point? Lavellan has no idea what Solas will do next. None of them do. But the combined efforts of Rook, Lavellan and Morrigan get through to him. Because Solas makes a choice - a monumental choice. He binds himself to the veil, committing to atonement. Atonement is a powerful, active word. It evokes the gravity of recognizing wrongdoing and the courage to address it. His decision to seek restoration with the Titans, to deal with the Blight, to return to where it all began, reflects the depth of his remorse and his willingness to rebuild the balance he disrupted – from the beginning.
Solas equates atonement with isolation, believing that his punishment must be borne alone. To him, atonement requires severing ties, including the possibility of love. He doesn’t ask Lavellan to join him because he cannot conceive of burdening her with the weight of his choices and the path he must walk.
But Lavellan’s words - once again - challenge that. She offers him the possibility that his actions, no matter how devastating, do not erase the love and faith others still have in him. This is an invitation.
She's also being vulnerable here. She’s offering herself to him, knowing full well that he still might say no. A risk she’s willing to take.
He doesn’t try to shut her out or push her away this time. Instead, he shifts the focus - he needs her to understand the gravity of the path they are about to walk. His response reflects his own vulnerability as well, he wants her to know what she’s choosing, but he can’t bring himself to reject her offer outright.
Solas responds in Elven - his acknowledgment of their shared understanding and their entire relationship and journey that has shaped them.
His words also mark a turning point: for the first time, Solas allows Lavellan her agency. Throughout their relationship, he has taken her choices away. He broke off their relationship in Inquisition. He vanished after Corypheus’s defeat, leaving her no say in it all.
And he knows this! During their confrontation in Trespasser, when Lavellan demands answers, he justifies his deception with, “And what would you have had me say? That I was the great adversary in your people’s mythology?” Her cutting reply, “I would have had you trust me!” lands with devastating clarity. His face falls, struck by the hard truth: the man who values freedom has stripped hers away. And he's going to do it again.
This moment in Veilguard feels like a callback to that. Lavellan is asserting her choice. And this time, Solas doesn’t take it from her.
By framing his destination in such stark, "terrible" terms, Solas isn’t pushing her away out of cruelty. He’s laying bare the enormity of what lies ahead, warning her of the peril while giving her the freedom to choose for herself. It’s his way of ensuring she understands the stakes.
Solas is doing what she requested long ago - trusting her - and what a choice to place that trust in. He’s entrusting her to make an informed decision about stepping onto a path that could shape the future of Thedas. He is trusting Lavellan’s strength and resiliency. And in trusting her, Solas reveals a quiet, unspoken truth: he doesn’t want to face this journey alone. By even presenting the choice, he reveals a quiet hope that she might go with him, despite everything.
To me, what makes this moment so achingly beautiful is the duality in his expression. His eyes seem to plead two things at once: “I don’t want to put you in harm’s way,” and “I can’t deny wanting to be with you.” There’s a raw vulnerability in the way he looks at her.
“It won’t be terrible if you’re with me.”
Lavellan’s response is a direct challenge to Solas’s warning. He tells her the path ahead will be awful - because of him. But she counters, saying that it’s because of him that it won’t be. This isn’t her forcing herself into his journey or suggesting that she alone will make it better. Instead, it’s her way of expressing that his presence will give her the strength to face whatever lies ahead. She’s trying to ease his mind, while also signaling her willingness to trust him again.
At the same time, her words acknowledge the weight of Solas’s suffering, offering herself as a partner to bear that burden together. She isn’t dismissing the risks or downplaying the severity of what’s to come - she’s choosing to stand beside him, fully aware of the challenges ahead.
It’s not about personal gain; it’s about shared resilience. Lavellan’s focus is on what they can endure together, not on what she might receive from the journey.
And since the Fade reflects emotions, as many have pointed out, their combined trust and love could manifest in ways neither of them can predict. Their bond has the power to shape not just their path but the very world around them.
This declaration is past, present and future; it’s a reaffirmation of their bond, a recognition that they’ve been walking the path of the dinan’shiral together all along. It’s future focused - she is offering to shoulder the burden with him going forward.
She’s also telling him that she won't abandon him, no matter how hard the road ahead may be.
And at the end of the day, she's a woman who still loves him. What does Prince Lir say in The Last Unicorn? "I love whom I love."
I've never interpreted Lavellan as someone sitting by a window for ten years, writing sad poetry and sighing into the wind, longing for Solas. She’s been busy - rebuilding a fractured world, navigating political fallout, and seeking understanding. Lavellan’s love for Solas isn’t blind devotion; she’s holding onto the possibility of redemption and the deep impact he had on her life. In my world state, Lavellan’s clan is wiped out. The people of the Inquisition have become her family, the ones she fights for and protects. And indirectly, Solas gave her that family. Despite the pain he’s caused, her love for him reflects the complexity of her journey - one defined not by a single relationship, but by hope, resilience, and the connections she’s forged along the way.
Lavellan then leans in to kiss him, and Solas allows himself to be drawn in. This moment is acceptance - a silent vow, a promise sealed in their shared vulnerability. It’s an intimate connection forged in front of those who have just witnessed the emotional storm that brought them to this point, as if to say, “This is where we stand, together.”
While I won’t dive into fly-cam images (you can find some here), there are some tender subtle details: the way he caresses her hands with his thumbs, the way he holds onto her one hand as she pulls away, as if he’s not ready to let go. But I promised to stay within game constraints.
And then Solas turns to Rook and says, “Thank you.”
Solas doesn’t thank Rook when he hands them the dagger, nor when he’s preparing to walk into the Fade. He says it after the kiss. Make of that what you will but Rook’s is symbolic for me, especially after thinking about this ending a bit.
In thanking Rook, Solas acknowledges not only their actions but also their understanding of the connection he shares with Lavellan. Rook, transformed by their own relationships and the bonds they’ve formed throughout their journey, embodies the themes that have always defined Dragon Age to me: connection, fellowship, community, love, and redemption. These games (again, for me) have always been about how people, despite their flaws and struggles, can come together to make the impossible possible.
Rook’s symbolism in the redemption ending feels like the culmination of this ethos. They represent how even those who begin on the periphery of great events can become central to forging bonds and creating change. Solas’s gratitude is for Rook's empathy, their recognition of the importance of connection, and their role in bringing these threads of love and redemption together. I'll go cry now.
And off they go into the Fade.
The Final Translation
"With Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain dead, and the Inquisitor finally reunited with her true love, it looked like one of the biggest stories the world had ever seen was finally drawing to a close."
Varric’s narration ties the ending image back to the connection between Inquisition and Veilguard. Inquisition is the Inquisitor’s story; Veilguard is Rook’s. Solas serves as the thread linking them. Varric frames this moment through Lavellan’s perspective, narrating the story like one of his novels - not to diminish Solas, but to highlight the Inquisitor’s journey. After all, Veilguard wouldn’t exist without Inquisition. Rook wouldn’t be working with Varric or searching for Solas if not for the Inquisitor.
As much as I would have loved a deeper focus on Solas, Veilguard wasn’t his story. If Inquisition is the Inquisitor’s story and Veilguard is Rook’s, this ending is a shared culmination: for a romanced Lavellan, it’s the personal resolution of her journey; for Rook, it’s recognition of their critical role in saving Thedas.
Okay, indulgence over - whew, that was long! I really need to practice shorter posts.
In the end, those who dislike this romance or this ending probably always will. That’s fine; I just wanted to share my interpretations because I genuinely love this story for all its complexity.
To everyone who made it to the end of this post - thank you for joining me in my indulgence. May your own Solas ships continue to bring you joy and inspiration.
Elven language resources:
Project Elvehn on AO3
Elven Translator
World Anvil Elvhen Resource
Reddit on Elvhen Poetry
#solas#dragon age#dragon age veilguard#dragon age inquisition#solas analysis#lavellan#mythal#datv#Rook#solavellan#solasmancer#fandom ships#da:i#dragon age trespasser#solas x lavellan#The Last Unicorn reference!
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This is one of the additions I appreciate most (there have been many great ones!), and in hindsight, I wish I'd put more context like this my original post. It was unnecessary to insist books/media can't be traumatic, which is dismissive of anyone who might be vulnerable and unfortunate enough to actually have been traumatized in that way and created a lot of side disputes about whether it's possible, which has distracted from the main goal of better understanding what trauma is like. If I had a do-over, I'd have phrased more of it with questions -- "Do you actually mean 'traumatize'? Do you know what goes into trauma and PTSD or acute stress disorder? Knowing that, do you feel it's accurate to use that term? What do you think might be the knock-off effects on trauma survivors (including and especially anyone who has been through a real-life version of the book/movie? Are you telling someone their basic existence is an infohazard, contaminating, unspeakable)? And lastly, could you use advice or support or resources to manage the aftermath of reading that book?"
Depending on how the rest of the conversation went, that last question might be said sarcastically. Though I do realize, especially after reading the notes of this post, that some people need access to much better coping strategies for managing feelings that fiction gives them. And stories can have lingering effects, some of them downright strange when we type them out (your snake example reminds me of some childhood experiences I blogged about earlier as an outgrowth of discussion around this post, and a few continuing adult habits of mine). But not all effects, even negative or uncomfortable ones, rise to the level of "trauma." And the experience of learning and having empathy for a terrible situation can, as you say, result in a "me" the reader likes and appreciates! (My last caveat is that nonfiction on topics like the Holocaust, because it's a real-life and generational trauma, might not always function the same way as fiction. People can and do get secondary/vicarious trauma from taking in media coverage of real life atrocities and tragedies. Though it's more likely to happen to the contractors moderating Facebook to remove violent imagery for hours on end, or someone processing information about their own family or loved ones' deaths or injuries, rather than to a Gentile like me reading a book on the Holocaust written and illustrated for a general audience while reclining comfortably on my couch. I read Primo Levi's Survival in Auschwitz as a preteen 21 years ago, and some details and phrases stick with me. But I'm not getting sensory flashbacks or dragging myself around in a fog on the anniversary of the date I read the book. Levi survived the trauma of Auschwitz. I just read about it.)
I'm wondering if, as a society who cares about vulnerable people, we could stop saying "traumatize" when we truly mean "upset"?
I am sick of hearing sad books or movies "traumatize" their readers. I simply do not believe that happens. A traumatic experience might be adjacent to books (I have vivid memories of books I was reading around certain experiences and even how the contents of those books affected my processing of the experiences). But it's not caused by the book. And, y'know. The weather is Christofascist Censorship Attempts outside.
Meanwhile from the other side I continue to be surprised at just how badly people fail to understand trauma and traumatic experiences in general. Watering down the term isn't helping. Find other hyperbole to express that The Bridge to Terebithia gutted you, chewed on your heartstrings, and made you cry your first pair of contact lenses right out of your preteen eyes.
#abuse cw#self-harm mention cw#trauma#long post#Holocaust cw#I've bitten my tongue in reblogs from asking: Do you think EMDR might help you free yourself from the bonds of Bridge to Terebithia?#but maybe I should just have asked it#because if the answer is 'yes' - someone's taken a step toward getting help! if the answer is 'no' - it's clarifying#(yet another caveat that EMDR is not the only therapy for trauma and doesn't work for everyone. But it's a helpful example.)
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An Expressed Opinion
Today I received a comment, an opinion, on my Slingshot Loosed post; the post where I share my recent cyber bullying, mocking, and intimidation at the hands of Tif... and I wanted to share it, along with my response, with you all.
The comment from *Penelope*:
Threatening to contact these people is not anymore okay than any of this behavior you have explained in your post. Stay away from them as I'm sure they are very aware of her and her content. You chose to engage with her, so deal with it without involving them
Note that I have since deleted *Penelope's* comment so that I can protect her/his/their (henceforth referred to in the feminine) identity. I have NOT done this because her comment is wrong! Rather, it's because I don't want her to receive any push-back for expressing her opinions given that I'm highlighting her comment here in this post.
I value opinions (even those I don't agree with) when they're expressed well, they're well thought out, they come from a place of knowledge and/or experience, and include facts if facts are relevant and/or available. Especially when the expresser of that opinion is willing to discuss and critique it. It's opinions that are derived from want/desire/emotion (often reactionary or "I want my own way") that I place less value in. These types of opinions are more a reflection on the emotional wants of the person and so I view them, and the opinion, through that lens.
*Penelope's* opinion came from a place of conviction, and I felt that. It was also an opinion that I expect to hear more of, which is why I'm showcasing it in this post.
My response:
I appreciate your opinion *Penelope*. Let's lay some truth on the table. Tif involved Luke & Nicola by using their images to cyber bully, mock and intimidate me. I didn't involve them. And if, as you say, they're "very aware of her and her content" (I certainly hope that's the case!), I would argue that I doubt very much they know she's using their photos, their personalities, their individual and paired brands, to cyber bully. I can't see them being very happy about that fact!
I simply want a public apology from Tif for accusing me of starting a Jake-mocking account; an accusation she shared to anyone viewing her IG stories on a Friday evening, December 20, 2024.
My experience with characters like Tif (those with narcissist tendencies) is that she won't give that apology unless I have leverage. Let's be clear though... Tif gave me that leverage by publicly using images like Luke & Nicola laughing (it can be assumed based on context) at me, and Nicola giving me (again, context) the middle finger. SHE did. I will have no need to use that leverage if I receive a public apology from Tif. Period.
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Transcript: I feel like some people care less about canon and more about using it as a tool to shit on other peoples enjoyment /takes of characters and ships. Like they will point out how this ship could never work in canon and then wildly misinterpret another character knowingly to the point I have to assume their appreciation for Canon extends only as far as their ability to use it to be negative towards others goes.
These same people act like it's the end of the world if someone draws A ship they don't like, or if someone draws one they do like in a different context than they prefer. Ya'll will be fine if someone dares to not like your OTP or not have it be in their AU.
Honestly I feel it's only a matter of time until someone snaps at a fictive or fictionkin or similar for not being "Canon enough" in their eyes, and that's really upsetting honestly.
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Hello, I'm not sure if you'll see this or not but I thought I would ask so I know everyone is excited about BTS year this year and is eager to anticipate their return, and I kind of wanted to talk about the infantilization of BTS prior to their MS and when they come out, so I do know at their core, BTS will still be the same loveable people, but my thoughts are running on who defines what infantilism is when it comes to the boys, for example: I was being accused of infantilizing Jimin and Jungkook because I found some of the things they do cute and adorable, I mean, they have cute moments right? (AYS for example) I still acknowledge they are grown adults and respect them as the adults they are, but now I'm questioning if these things that I'm finding cute really are babying them and I don't want to treat them like that/that way, so i wanted to know if you wouldn't mind sharing your thoughts on this?
Hi anon, how are you? Happy New Year!
Oh, this is an interesting question.
I think what’s happening in the case you’re describing is that the people saying that to you don’t really understand what “infantilisation” means.
Infantilisation happens when we treat or perceive someone as if they lack the maturity or ability to be a responsible adult, regardless of their actual actions. For example, if someone dismisses their ability to act, their opinions, or their choices by labelling them as "childish" or incapable, that’s infantilisation.
A fandom example is when people think they have the right to decide for X members whether they should stay with the agency, collaborate with certain artists, or interact with certain members. It happens when someone undermines a member’s decision-making ability, treating them like a child who doesn’t know what’s best for them. It’s not about finding them cute or endearing – it’s about treating them as though they can’t differentiate between right and wrong or make their own choices about what to say or do. That’s the kind of infantilisation many of us criticise in fandoms and, honestly, on the internet in general when it comes to fans of public figures.
In your case, what you’re describing sounds more like appreciation for their natural charm and personality rather than denial of their maturity. In Korean culture, there’s something called aegyo, which is basically acting cute – almost like a small child being adorable. It’s a big part of Korean entertainment, not just in K-pop, and BTS is known for doing it too. Sometimes it’s their personality shining through, and other times it’s part of their persona. You can usually tell the difference depending on the context.
So finding someone’s actions endearing without dismissing their adulthood is perfectly fine. For example, enjoying how Jimin and Jungkook interacted during AYS (or their playful dynamics in general) doesn’t mean you’re erasing their adulthood. They were often super cute during the show, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. That’s not infantilisation – that’s you finding their actions adorable or cute.
Before Jin and Hobi were discharged, I wondered if that side of them would change – if they’d stop being these cheekily adorable and sometimes mischievous people for their fans. But it hasn’t. From what we’ve seen, they’re the same as they were before, just with a year or two more life experience. That’s it. We don’t know if they’ve changed in private, but honestly, that’s none of our business.
Jungkook’s December Wlive was a perfect example of my point. He behaved just as he always has in his lives, especially over the past few years, and more than a few fans called him cute and silly or said they just wanted to squish him because he brings out those emotions in his fans. That doesn’t mean we think he’s a child – some people do, and that is infantilisation – but most of us simply find him endearing at times.
The misunderstanding of terms or labels also reminds me of how some people in the fandom label anyone who happens to see a member in public, take a picture, or mention it as a sasaeng. Or how some even describe certain fansites as sasaengs. A sasaeng is an obsessive fan who invades a celebrity’s personal life and privacy; in this case, is someone going to extreme lengths to follow or interact with idols. A fan spotting a member in public and taking a picture or just mentioning seeing them in X place isn’t being a sasaeng. This behaviour of misunderstanding terms or labels is not new.
I don’t know what’s going on lately, whether it’s newer fans or something else, but I’ve seen people on social media trying to police things that really don’t need policing or making others feel bad for things that are pretty standard in fandoms like this. For example – and I think this wasn’t specifically our fandom but a K-pop stan in general – someone tweeted criticising people who collect photocards. Like, why? Why should anyone feel bad or embarrassed about collecting photocards? Collecting is one of the most normal hobbies ever. Some people collect photocards, others collect toy cars, and some even collect women! (That last one should honestly be a crime, but that’s another conversation.) Why is it okay for men to collect photocards of sports players, sorry, I mean “sports cards” but not for people to collect photocards of artists? The double standards in society are wild.
Anon, I think it’s amazing that you’re so self-aware that you’re checking in with others to see if your behaviour might be problematic. That says a lot about the kind of person you are. In this case, I don’t think you have anything to worry about – but the people who told you that definitely do.
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Hola otra vez! For anyone not familiar with my annoying rambly feedback, ahead there be
This is the end of the first paragraph of the story and it's just so fcking ... like it works SO well for me, it makes me wanna spike a football
it's hard to find places where he's thought of as a stranger. no familiar faces, no conversation, no fuss. just logan, a bottle of whisky and time.
logan had no reason to keep count. until he saw you.
Well, if there's any indication a man is smitten, I'd say it's when he decides to keep counting after 200 years on Earth cuz of YOU *ded*
the bar was busy, as it normally was. he didn't mind it this way, less attention on him, less chances of someone trying to pick a fight with a specific stranger. not that they'd win, but logan had grown too tired for petty fights these days.
It's super interesting to think about Logan in relation to time and age. We just went from him deciding he's got a reason to keep counting the years to him being so tired that he doesn't want to get into petty fights. And as someone who grew up with Logan on the XMen cartoon lol, I know Logan to BE petty. So whilst we can't always think of Logan in terms of age, cuz looking at his appearance can make us forget, to hear that he's so TIRED that he doesn't even wanna squabble up on occasion? Well, that's impactful. The author makes it hit home in this other way and I really like it.
And here's another example of the author getting across to us where Logan is at when we meet him in life:
you're easy on the eyes, especially to these tired old hues that have grown accustomed to staring at the same old walls.
Straight up now we have the word tired, but also old. And not in relation to himself, but what he's got eyes on. It's such a clever thing the author has done here, and I really am appreciative of it.
logan can't let himself look too much, he isn't allowed nice things, especially not pretty little things such as yourself. he's poison, tainting everything he touches, spoiling it. he's experienced enough heartbreak, enough losses for a lifetime and more.
Sad face. This is very in line with the Logan I think most of us know (and adore). Gotta take all the blame, gotta punish yourself, gotta try to protect others from you by denying yourself connections. Wanna hug him.
he wonders if you know most of the tips you receive by the end of the night are from him. you're diligent, you work hard, and you deserve more than the minimum wage you're probably getting.
Also very on brand for Logan. Sees a need, fills the need, but doesn't want credit for it. He's also seeing someone he believes is worthy (and perhaps not in a way he feels he could ever be?) of more so he tries to be the provider.
it's not even lust on his mind either, he just finds himself captivated by your presence. he wonders about your life, your interests, your dreams. . .
And again, we are seeing how smitten he is because the man who has been painted as weary and bored suddenly has questions and wonderings again. That is, in the context of Logan's long a$$ existence, quite magical. But that magic is immediately followed by
though he'd be lying if he said he'd never pictured bending you over against the bar and fucking you senseless. he is an animal, after all.
and it's like
relying on others was a weakness. besides, what would you be to him but just another person he'd lose someday? it wasn't worth it. you weren't worth it. fuck.
"Relying on others was a weakness" is just hella relatable to me, so I key in on that. And then that ire being followed by showing vulnerability by thinking of her as another person he'd lose; Logan's heart has always been huge and you just know he remembers the faces and details of each person he has had to lose and she has that status already. Logan trying to lie to himself with the "not worth it" talk only to have to curse himself cuz he KNOW he's lying is also peak Logan behavior, and once again on a personal level, hiiiiiiiiiiiiiighly relatable lol. I'm always lying to myself about my own feelings.
you were strangers, this was stupid, it was all fucking stupid. but the mind of a lonely old man is a desperate one, and what logan really craves isn't just eye candy.
"Lonely and desperate" self descriptions and Logan referring to himself as "stupid." I'm sure we all wanna shake this old man, right? LOL because when he let's himself think about the truth:
he craves a touch, that first touch that sparks electricity throughout your every nerve ending, causes goosebumps to ripple along the skins surface. he craves something, anything. he was so fucking hungry. always so fucking hungry. a rumbling hunger that starts at the pit of his stomach and gnaws through him like a rabid animal frantically trying to escape a suffocating metal cage. it's a hunger he can't satisfy, he knows he can't satisfy. but he'd been alone so long.
It's connection, and it's gnawing at him. Loneliness is a helluva thing, and I think a lot of us know this. But this author is shining in the way she is describing it for us, outside of the usual age/years gone by methods. Tired, lonely, and now ravenous. And while we are in the space of a more spiritual hunger, here, it so easily slides right back to physical as well because he's thinking about a woman and wonders
surely one bite couldn't hurt?
Me literally screaming into my pumpkin pillow cuz I'm like NO IT COULDN'T LOGAN, GO GET HERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR cuz I know what's gonna follow is gonna be liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
switching bars wasn't particularly appealing to him, but it was better than having to look at you and feel that familiar ache.
The self loathing and denial is top tier Logan. He will inconvenience and punish himself just as long as it's in line with denying himself cuz he just "doesn't deserve it." Siiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.
Logan then proceeds to go drain the snake before he beings his newest self inflicted penance, but she comes in to clean the bathrooms thinking they were empty.
Gurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl lol
your eyes lock on one another for just a split second before you quickly busy yourself with the mop again. but that split second was enough. it was enough to notice how you were looking at him.
HOW WAS SHE LOOKING AT YOU, LOGAN?!?! It's funny how if it was almost any other man, I'd snort and be like, sure buddy. But it's Logan so I have ZERO issue believing whatever he saw in her eyes let her know she DOES indeed know him and want ... well, something.
you lean back against the bathroom stall divider, eyes drifting across logan's figure. he was tall, big. this is the first time you're really able to look at him, to study the features of his face. this time he's not hiding behind a glass or a bottle.
How interesting to see the contrast of her view of Logan because while he's always looking at her and sworn that he never caught her looking his way, she's letting us know she has definitely looked his way enough to notice he was a man in hiding. And she actually acted respectfully to respect that and not ogle him, which bummed Logan out lol.
the hunger in his gaze is obvious, but it's dulled, like he's just barely holding back. you think he looks lonely, there's a distinct air about him that practically screams that he needs to be touched.
Oof, she's intuitive! So she SEES what he needs and seems to be quite willing to, ahem, deliver for him but WILL HE LET HER is the big question.
logan pushes himself from the sink and approaches you slowly. was he really doing this? after a month of pining and longing for you, a stranger in a bar, was he really going to give in to his desires? would you let him? the lust was clear in your eyes and he knew he was reflecting it right back tenfold.
you eye the stranger who's been watching you, tipping you. of course you've noticed, you'd have to be pretty stupid or oblivious not to. you've come to expect him at each shift, but his presence intrigued you more than the other regulars. not just because he was more handsome, considerably more handsome. no, it was those sad eyes that seemed to say a million words while his mouth remained firmly shut that had you curious. even now as he stands before you so silent you could hear a pin drop, when you look into his eyes you can feel a sea of words brewing.
I do so love the fact that she's intuitive, curious and sees beyond the big burly handsome cover. He never speaks but look at his eyes and boy, are there a thousand stories waiting to be told. And it's the SAME WAY in the present with her. Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike, it's about to go off.
oh how you wanted to open him up, to peer inside behind that rough exterior, to take a peek behind the facade. you're sure you're easier to read than he is.
Again, I love that this goes beyond physical with her and that she's genuinely intrigued by him and by what probably most others don't see in Logan.
"i've seen you, you know," you mumble bravely, "looking at me." logan doesn't seem surprised, he brings a hand up to hold your chin, turning your face from side to side to get a proper look at you now that he has you up close. "yeah?" "yeah," you reply shakily, "thought i was imagining it at first. but by the second night it was obvious." he smirks, so he's not as subtle as he thinks.
No because how is he the King of Self Denial but somehow automatically is giving Dom the first time he approaches a woman he means to get to know? Not even embarrassing at being caught at his blatant perusal of her. SIR.
logan grips your wrists, not the suit. he wasn't talking about that now, he had to shut you up.
When I tell you this BROKE me. King of Self Inflicted Penance. I stg. And it's quite the conundrum to be going through an emotional gut punch when it's immediately followed up with
he leans in, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss as his strong hands keep a firm grip on your wrists. you submit, leaning back against the cubicle divider as you let him slip his tongue into your mouth.
and we know it is OFF TO THE RACES!!!
"taste so fuckin' sweet," he mumbles against your lips, kissing you between words, "you do this often? let men kiss you in the bathroom?" you mumble a 'no' under your breath, ". . . just the ones who tip good," you grin.
OH SH!T, WE HAVE HAN AND LEIA BANTER! They are my OTP so I'm always gonna call a combative in love couple that, but this dynamic is MY JAM and I love that what we seem to have here is a clearly dominant male with a bratty female. I am in Heaven lol
logan feels himself chuckling, biting your lower lip. oh, he liked you.
WE DO TOO, LOGAN!
his hand travels upwards, finding purchase around your neck. you gasp in response, moaning. he eagerly swallows your moan with his mouth, drowning out any sound that threatens to escape.
Always a trip when I am personally attacked by a fic lmaoooooooooo
he kisses you like a man starved, like he'd devour you if you let him. and you would, you think, if it felt this good.
"shhh, shhh," he whispers against your lips, "feel good? i know it feels good, but you gotta stay nice and quiet."
I want to diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie at the giving of instructions and reminder that, HEY WE ARE IN PUBLIC but we are absolutely NOT stopping.
"you wanted this just as much as i did, huh?" he growls into your ear, "need it, need me to fuck you."
Excellent dirty taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalk
he nods against the side of your cheek, his stubble scratching against your soft skin, "there we go, attagirl. . ."
And he praises? *dies again*
"yeah i am," logan smirks, he knows he's big, and he knows exactly how to use it. you just have time to gasp before you feel one of his hands connect harshly with your skin, the sound ringing out in the small bathroom of the bar.
"you've been thinkin' about this since you started your shift," logan says confidently, his words confirmed by how you drip around him, "thought about me fillin' you up, nice and full?"
I once again must mention top tier dirty talk!
and fuck does it make him harder to know that you've thought about this just as much as he has.
Once again, Logan's vulnerability is illustrated here because it's very human and natural to WANT TO BE WANTED so that it's exciting for him makes all the sense.
he knows if he lets you look at him, look up at him for too long, he'll lose it. he can't have your soft eyes on him while he fucks you, he doesn't deserve it.
*shakes him* He's still so Logan. Trying to convince himself again he is just not worthy. But I also do this to myself which is no doubt why I key on it, mention it, react to it. That just means the author is striking a chord with me and isn't that what we want? To feel resonance and know we are not alone in our experiences?
because he can't describe the shame that swirls in his stomach, that this is how he relieves himself, a quick fuck in a bar. this dirty older man who's seen so much sin, perpetuated sin with his own hands, who longed for the young pretty little thing in the bar. logan doesn't deserve nice things, this he knows.
It's a jarring feeling to be really into some hot smut and then have there be an intermission of this caliber. Cuz again, we are seeing into Logan's heart and his internal self who just screams and screams about not being worthy. And it's so painful and wretched for us as an audience cuz we KNOW it's not true and we just wish HE WOULD SEE IT.
you can't help but smirk, mouth stuck open as you moan softly, he likes it when you talk to him during, huh?
Even in her blissful state, she is noticing what he likes and trying to provide that for him and I love her for considering him and being thoughtful with him. HE doesn't think he deserves it, but we readers know that he absolutely does so it's sweetness in this midst of lust and shows us that she cares beyond whatever is happening now in this bathroom.
Y'all NEED to go read this cuz the smut is rough but because of the well established connection the author built between these two, it's very intimate despite the circumstances which don't necessarily lend themselves to anything other than a "quickie." Because of what's going on between these two and how well laid out that is for us, we know that the reason this is so rough and intimate is BECAUSE it's not meant for just here and now. But will Logan allow anything more?
standing on trembling legs, you lean up, giving him a surprisingly soft kiss. your hands take over his, helping him back into his jeans, zipping them up, clasping the buttons together and buckling his belt. all the while your lips are on his, slowly, passionately intertwining together.
And again, I love her for her thoughtfulness. She's being soft and tender with him. I'm not sure if it's a conscious effort to keep him from screwing things up (by trying to now brush her off) or if it's just naturally who she is and giving into her instinct to want to be gentle with him and keep him close. Either way, I love love love this moment.
". . . does that count as your tip for the night?" you joke with a smirk, hoping to see a flash of his smile again, hoping to alleviate some of that shame he's carrying.
Adore her for infusing humor into the situation and wanting to bring light back into his eyes. Whoever is going to be with Logan needs to have a sense of humor and give him as good as he gives.
the shame seems to settle, begins to dissipate. it feels less like satisfying an urge and more like. . . exploring something new. his eyes drift back to you.
Is Logan ACTUALLY going to give this thing a chance, and more importantly, HIMSELF a chance?!?!
I hate to quote too much in a story, especially an ending becuase I WANT PEOPLE TO GO READ FOR THEMSELVES but I need @silverskyeline to know that the last 3 paragraphs of this piece are SO FCKING GOOD.
The breakthrough and revelation he has, the tentative willingness to let himself release a burden and not self flagellate? OMGGGGGGGGGGG. Literally all the applause and bravo on this amazing piece. I really really fcking enjoyed it and am so grateful to you for creating and sharing.
It's really a wonderful character analysis or look at who Logan is, the person he think he has to be, with some hot smut that actually isn't a pause in the narrative but continues the throughline of exploring who he is and what he thinks he deserves and how he's giving himself permission to be a man again. I just ... I love this so so much. Thank you again.
'hunger' 18+
worst!wolverine x f!reader (3.9k words) summary: logan can't tear his mind away from the new barmaid at his usual haunt. he tries to resist you, he really does. but when you're both alone in the bathroom, he finds he's not the only one plagued with filthy thoughts. tags: for the 'longing' prompt for logan promptober, set in the bar from the movie, kind of angsty, filthy, pent up logan, alcohol consumption, doggy style, creampie, biting, light choking, pinning wrists, hair pulling, spanking, rough sex, implied age gap, sweet ending.
his usual haunts offer comfort, safe nests tucked away down isolated roads, usually requiring quite the drive to find - it's hard to find places where he's thought of as a stranger. no familiar faces, no conversation, no fuss. just logan, a bottle of whisky and time.
time spent staring into the grain of the old wood on the bar wondering how the fuck he ended up here. he'd stopped keeping count a long time ago, how long he'd been around, been alive. things get kind of hazy after two hundred years. logan had no reason to keep count.
until he saw you.
the bar was busy, as it normally was. he didn't mind it this way, less attention on him, less chances of someone trying to pick a fight with a specific stranger. not that they'd win, but logan had grown too tired for petty fights these days.
he's sat at the bar when the bartender clocks off, switching with someone new, someone he'd never seen before. you walk in and his eyes immediately scan your face, your build, your outfit. it's a habit of his, one he hoped he'd grow out of - but logan has learned that he'll never stop assessing for new threats. it's just in his dna.
but what he finds isn't a threat.
you're easy on the eyes, especially to these tired old hues that have grown accustomed to staring at the same old walls. he drags his eyes back down to his glass like he's forcing himself to look down the barrel of a gun rather than looking at you, before settling on you once more.
logan can't let himself look too much, he isn't allowed nice things, especially not pretty little things such as yourself. he's poison, tainting everything he touches, spoiling it. he's experienced enough heartbreak, enough losses for a lifetime and more.
. . . but what harm can looking do?
a few weeks pass, logan notices you're in every few nights from now on, must have been put on the regular rota. he wonders if you know most of the tips you receive by the end of the night are from him. you're diligent, you work hard, and you deserve more than the minimum wage you're probably getting.
you've never noticed him, or at least, he's never caught you looking in his direction. but he finds himself craving it, willing your eyes to meet his even for a second. the extent of your interactions have been sliding a glass or a bottle in his direction before continuing with your other duties.
it's not even lust on his mind either, he just finds himself captivated by your presence. he wonders about your life, your interests, your dreams. . . though he'd be lying if he said he'd never pictured bending you over against the bar and fucking you senseless.
he is an animal, after all.
he wonders if he should switch bars just to distance himself. he couldn't let himself become comfortable with the idea of you. relying on others was a weakness. besides, what would you be to him but just another person he'd lose someday? it wasn't worth it. you weren't worth it.
fuck.
logan curses himself under his breath for even having this internal debate. you were strangers, this was stupid, it was all fucking stupid. but the mind of a lonely old man is a desperate one, and what logan really craves isn't just eye candy. he craves a touch, that first touch that sparks electricity throughout your every nerve ending, causes goosebumps to ripple along the skins surface. he craves something, anything.
he was so fucking hungry. always so fucking hungry. a rumbling hunger that starts at the pit of his stomach and gnaws through him like a rabid animal frantically trying to escape a suffocating metal cage. it's a hunger he can't satisfy, he knows he can't satisfy. but he'd been alone so long.
surely one bite couldn't hurt?
no, he finds himself shaking his head as he stands from the bar. he'd take a leak, and leave early. it'd only been a month since he first saw you, he could get over this. switching bars wasn't particularly appealing to him, but it was better than having to look at you and feel that familiar ache.
the bathroom door swings open and he walks inside, situating himself at one of the urinals. a few moments later, the door swings open again, logan doesn't bother to look over.
"oh, thought these were empty, sorry."
his head turns quickly. it's you, mop in hand. there's an uncomfortable silence that follows.
speak, fucking speak. "it's fine."
you pause, then nod a little and begin mopping the floor.
his eyes are back on the urinal, swallowing hard. was this really going to be your first conversation? with his eyes glaring into old porcelain, dick in his hand? he tries not to picture you stealing glances at him, but he can't help it. is that what he wants?
maybe.
finishing up, he quickly makes his way over to the sinks, pushing his hands under the cool water and rubbing with soap. his eyes flit up to the mirror. and he catches you.
your eyes lock on one another for just a split second before you quickly busy yourself with the mop again.
but that split second was enough. it was enough to notice how you were looking at him.
"all done," you say with a sigh after a few moments, standing straight and gripping the mop but making no effort to leave just yet.
logan eyes you in the mirror, watches how your eyes dance across the room before inevitably landing on him again. he turns to face you, noting the distance between you both in the room.
you lean back against the bathroom stall divider, eyes drifting across logan's figure. he was tall, big. this is the first time you're really able to look at him, to study the features of his face. this time he's not hiding behind a glass or a bottle.
the hunger in his gaze is obvious, but it's dulled, like he's just barely holding back. you think he looks lonely, there's a distinct air about him that practically screams that he needs to be touched.
you rest your mop against the wall, "you're in here often." you state, it's not a question.
"guess i'm a regular," he replies curtly.
swallowing hard, you continue, "i noticed. i always have to restock the whisky when you come by."
logan pushes himself from the sink and approaches you slowly. was he really doing this? after a month of pining and longing for you, a stranger in a bar, was he really going to give in to his desires? would you let him? the lust was clear in your eyes and he knew he was reflecting it right back tenfold.
"i like a drink." he says with a subtle shrug, just a step away now, eyes never leaving yours.
a small smile tugs at your lips, "i know."
you're not sure what you're really doing. you're supposed to be on shift, designated five minutes to clean the bathrooms. five minutes you'd much rather spend doing someone something else.
you eye the stranger who's been watching you, tipping you. of course you've noticed, you'd have to be pretty stupid or oblivious not to. you've come to expect him at each shift, but his presence intrigued you more than the other regulars. not just because he was more handsome, considerably more handsome.
no, it was those sad eyes that seemed to say a million words while his mouth remained firmly shut that had you curious. even now as he stands before you so silent you could hear a pin drop, when you look into his eyes you can feel a sea of words brewing.
oh how you wanted to open him up, to peer inside behind that rough exterior, to take a peek behind the facade. you're sure you're easier to read than he is.
you're not sure when or how it happened, but he's right in front of you now, his body almost touching yours. you look up at him with a feigned innocent look.
"i've seen you, you know," you mumble bravely, "looking at me."
logan doesn't seem surprised, he brings a hand up to hold your chin, turning your face from side to side to get a proper look at you now that he has you up close. "yeah?"
"yeah," you reply shakily, "thought i was imagining it at first. but by the second night it was obvious."
he smirks, so he's not as subtle as he thinks.
your hands snake down, finding his belt buckle and brazingly begin to unbuckle it. he watches you, eyes fixated on the way your fingers move. he swears he's about to start drooling. but then you move, hands winding up to the buttons on his shirt. you splay your hands across the fabric, eyes widening when you feel what's underneath.
"are you. . . is that-"
logan grips your wrists, not the suit. he wasn't talking about that now, he had to shut you up. he leans in, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss as his strong hands keep a firm grip on your wrists. you submit, leaning back against the cubicle divider as you let him slip his tongue into your mouth.
he moans, relishing the taste of you, the taste he's thought about for so fucking long. he brings your hands up, pinning them above your head, shifting his grip so one hand easily pins your wrists, leaving his other hand free.
his free hand plants firmly across your upper chest, the rough pads of his fingers brushing against your collarbone as he explores your mouth with his tongue. you're lost in the sensation, knees going weak as you allow the older man to have his way with you. he needs this, you know it.
"taste so fuckin' sweet," he mumbles against your lips, kissing you between words, "you do this often? let men kiss you in the bathroom?"
you mumble a 'no' under your breath, ". . . just the ones who tip good," you grin.
logan feels himself chuckling, biting your lower lip. oh, he liked you. his hand travels upwards, finding purchase around your neck. you gasp in response, moaning. he eagerly swallows your moan with his mouth, drowning out any sound that threatens to escape.
the kiss grows in intensity, you wonder how long it's been since he's kissed someone. he kisses you like a man starved, like he'd devour you if you let him. and you would, you think, if it felt this good.
his hand on your neck gives a gentle squeeze before running down your torso, palming at your jeans suddenly. you try to whimper in pleasure, but he's silencing you with his lips again.
"shhh, shhh," he whispers against your lips, "feel good? i know it feels good, but you gotta stay nice and quiet." logan can feel the material of your jeans begin to damp and he resists the urge to growl, feeling the way the fabric beneath gives way.
you nod, whispering small affirmatives as he touches you through the material. "just give me more," you whine.
and that spurs him on. in a flash he's pushing you into the stall, stealing a few more kisses where he can before he turns you, pushing your back against his chest. his lips find your neck, pressing hot open-mouthed kisses along the skin he finds there.
you're like putty in his hands, melting back against him as his hand returns to your crotch, rough hands massaging circles against your clothed core. you resist a moan, exhaling shakily instead as you let him use you.
"you wanted this just as much as i did, huh?" he growls into your ear, "need it, need me to fuck you."
you nod quickly as you feel his lips curve into a smirk against your skin.
"yeah, thought so," he nibbles on your earlobe, breathing deeply through his nose as he tries to steady himself, preserve the moment. but how can he when you feel this good beneath his fingers, taste this good on his tongue? "tell me you want it."
"want you to fuck me," you whimper almost immediately, suddenly feeling so very needy. there's a hot ache growing between your legs, one you're desperate for him to fill.
logan laughs, "you can do better than that, honey, know you can."
"please," your voice cracks and you swallow back moans as you squirm beneath his touch, "please fuck me-" it becomes apparent to you at that moment that you don't even know his name. your cheeks flush at the thought of letting this stranger, this older man fuck you in the bar bathroom, but actually, you kind of like it that way.
he nods against the side of your cheek, his stubble scratching against your soft skin, "there we go, attagirl. . ."
with that, he pushes you forward, forcing your hands onto the tank of the toilet to support yourself as he bends you over. his hands find your waist, his hips connecting with yours and slowly grinding his very apparent, large bulge against you.
you let out a whimper, arching your back a little at the sudden contact.
"feel that?" he mumbles, guiding your hips to grind back against him, "feel what you do to me?"
a gasp, "fuck, you're big." you can already tell, the way his bulge is pressing against you, demanding to be felt. you swear you can almost feel it throb through the material.
"yeah i am," logan smirks, he knows he's big, and he knows exactly how to use it.
pulling back slightly, he roughly pulls your jeans down, practically manhandling you, your underwear disappearing with it. he grabs handfuls of your ass before kneading the skin. "look at that, pretty little ass, all for me."
you just have time to gasp before you feel one of his hands connect harshly with your skin, the sound ringing out in the small bathroom of the bar. "f-fuck!" you whine, feeling the sharp sting, knowing there's a bright red imprint in the shape of his large palm on your ass.
there's some jingling, the sound of his belt being moved out of the way, a zipper. you prepare yourself, or at least you try to, but his cock is already slapping against your backside before you have time to steady your hazy mind.
"you gonna take all of me?" he asks, biting his lip as his aching length slaps against your skin, "think you can?"
you nod quickly, looking over your shoulder at him, "mhm!"
"if you say so. . ." he smirks and positions himself, one hand on your hip and one aiming his cock at your tight little hole.
then, all at once he's sinking in. you gasp, he gasps. and fuck, he is big. you feel that sweet stretch, his cock throbbing against your tight walls as it slowly glides inside. you're whining as it slowly fills you, eyes rolling back at the sensation. but he pulls out a little, only to push back in again.
he's working you up just right, mesmerised by the way you take his cock. his eyes are fixed on your tight hole begging him to enter, loving the slick sound as it pushes inside.
"you've been thinkin' about this since you started your shift," logan says confidently, his words confirmed by how you drip around him, "thought about me fillin' you up, nice and full?"
despite the way your cheeks flush bright red, you can't deny it. you've thought about it more than once, fantasised about it in bed, hoping that one day that stranger from the bar would fuck you so good you forget your own name.
you don't need to reply either, because he knows. he knows from the way your wet hole flutters around him, and fuck does it make him harder to know that you've thought about this just as much as he has. he begins to pump into you at a leisurely pace, firm hands on your hips.
"holy fuck, so fuckin' tight," logan grumbles, his deep slow strokes hitting you deep as he bottoms out inside of you.
you try to turn your head, to look up at him, but he grasps the back of your hair, pushing your head down. "nu-uh, keep that head down."
he knows if he lets you look at him, look up at him for too long, he'll lose it. he can't have your soft eyes on him while he fucks you, he doesn't deserve it. he'll take you, just like this, with your head down and your ass up and his cock buried deep inside you.
because he can't describe the shame that swirls in his stomach, that this is how he relieves himself, a quick fuck in a bar. this dirty older man who's seen so much sin, perpetuated sin with his own hands, who longed for the young pretty little thing in the bar. logan doesn't deserve nice things, this he knows.
you feel his thrusts grow rougher, your legs slipping apart as you attempt to hold yourself up, hands planted firmly on the tank of the toilet. you're squeaking softly with each pump, feeling him use you to release his pent-up frustrations. and it felt so fucking good.
with his firm grip on your hair tightening by the second and his other large hand digging into your hip, you begin to bounce back against his motions, sending him even deeper. you both moan in sync with the feeling and you pant softly, cheeks flushing further at the soft 'plap plap plap' of his hips connecting with you, the sound reverberating around the small cubicle.
"that feels so fucking good," you sing, closing your eyes. logan gives a particularly hard thrust, speed picking up. you can't help but smirk, mouth stuck open as you moan softly, he likes it when you talk to him during, huh? "keep fuckin' me, just like that, so good. . ."
he groans, wrapping your hair around his fist as he relentlessly pounds into you. harder and harder, deeper and deeper, you're sure you'll have bruises littered over your body before the day is through.
"harder!" you cry, feeling your legs tremble. you're not gonna last long like this, and by the way his cock is twitching inside of you, he isn't either. "i'm gonna cum, you're gonna make me fuckin' cum!"
another groan slips from his lips, gritting his teeth as he uses you, watching you take his throbbing cock beneath him. "look so pretty like this, bent over, takin' what i fuckin- shit. . . takin' what i give you."
your body grows hotter, sweat forming on your forehead, each impact pushing you forward roughly. you're really not gonna last long.
he begins to hunch over, his chest flush with your back as he huffs against your neck, fucking you like a rabid animal. you're squealing now, the pleasure swirling in your lower stomach, threatening to send you crashing into bliss. at this point, you don't fucking care if someone walks in and finds you like this, sees his feet planted behind yours underneath the stall. in fact, the thought of the risk sends a bolt straight to your gut.
"yes yes yes," you mutter, feeling your orgasm approaching steadily. you swear you can feel him in your guts. you begin to flutter around him, begging for release, knowing it's going to completely destroy you.
logan can't even form words, just grunts slipping from his lips against the side of your neck. and then he feels it, his cock twitches, his mind reeling with the imminent release. he needs this, oh he fucking needs this.
he bites down on your neck, teeth sinking in slightly as he feels himself release deep inside you, his cum spilling out in strong waves. you feel your knees buckle, but a strong hand planted on your tummy helps keep you upright as he fucks his release deeper into you.
the animalistic nature of his thrusts combined with the sensation of his hot cum painting your insides sends you flying over the edge, your orgasm milking him as you clamp around his aching cock. he slams his hand against the stall wall with a loud metallic bang, splaying his fingers across the metal as if to ground himself as his thrusts falter.
his tongue lazily licks the indents of his bite mark against your neck, groans easing their way from the back of his throat. you can hardly catch your breath, legs still shaking from such an intense release. it's hard to think straight with his dick still buried deep inside, feeling it twitch with every aftershock.
you both stay like that for a solid minute, panting, coming down together. he's planting soft kisses along your neck as your breath slowly comes back to you.
he pulls out, stepping back as he stuffs himself into his jeans. you collapse onto the toilet seat, shakily pulling your jeans and underwear back up as you look up at him. it's clear he's looking to leave, a distant look in his eye, maybe a little shame creeping into his features.
standing on trembling legs, you lean up, giving him a surprisingly soft kiss. your hands take over his, helping him back into his jeans, zipping them up, clasping the buttons together and buckling his belt. all the while your lips are on his, slowly, passionately intertwining together.
you pull back, buttoning your own jeans as you continue to look up at him. ". . . does that count as your tip for the night?" you joke with a smirk, hoping to see a flash of his smile again, hoping to alleviate some of that shame he's carrying.
and there it is, a small smirk on his lips as he glances away. "maybe."
the shame seems to settle, begins to dissipate. it feels less like satisfying an urge and more like. . . exploring something new. his eyes drift back to you.
"i'll see you tomorrow?" you ask, tilting your head.
he blinks, suddenly remembering time exists outside this small space seemingly crafted just for the two of you. "yeah," he says, quietly.
"good," you pat his chest before moving past him, leaving the stall. you stand, looking back at him. a beat, "or, you can meet me after my shift ends?"
his eyes widen, taken aback. fuck, had he forgotten how to do this? his eyes flit to the side, before making up his mind. he gives a firm nod.
you smile before leaving him in the bathroom, returning to the bar through the door.
logan stands there for a few moments, running his fingers through his hair. he smooths down his shirt, feeling the suit beneath, a stark reminder always of his past.
but maybe he could begin to take a few steps forward. maybe he deserves more than to suffer forever, forced to keep everyone at arm's length. maybe he could allow himself this small happiness, a date, or whatever this was.
maybe it was time to satisfy his hunger, his loneliness, for good.
#wolverine#logan howlett#marvel#fan fiction#feedback#drag queen#trixie mattel#bebe zahara benet#miz cracker#michelle visage#vanessa vanjie mateo#nicole byer#trinity taylor#animations#AND mine
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Hello Breaky,
One thing I am very excited about regarding your next fic “saving you” is the prerspective change we’ll see when it comes to Armin being small. Rather then Tinys being commonplace or at least known about. We shall see Armin in a position not even he fully understands how to deal with, I am especially looking forward to his first reaction to being tiny and the reaction of everyone else as well. The potential for shenanigans is very high.
Hi hi, Mercutio!! I hope you are doing well!! <3 As always, thank you SO MUCH for the ask!!
I am so so so happy that you are excited for my next major fic! And i'm very glad to answer questions about it!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!
Yes yes, Saving You is another tiny!Armin x Annie story, where he shrinks down this time! Armin will be the same size here as he is in The Difference Between Us, 4 inches tall! Toy sized! Stuff him in your pocket-sized!! You get the idea xD.
As you say, rather than Tiny's existing and being 'creatures' that are well-known throughout the world, SY is a canon-divergence story... which means that Armin is going to be VERY out of water so to say. He will have to face this world that already made him feel small, while being LITERALLY SMALL... So, expect lots of angsty goodness, hehe. His first reaction will be notable and especially given the context of how and why he was shrunk in the first place!
The reaction of others is indeed something I want to include, though I can't say how much we'll get to see it throughout the main scenario, considering... but ofc, things can always change as I develop it more closely. What I do want to have are bonus chapters! Namely, with other characters getting their own time to spend with miniature Armin x3. So, I will say now, yes that includes Mikasa, hehe. Lots of cuteness is ASSURED!! SO MUCH CUTE!! Of course, there will be A LOT of shenanigans, ooooooh so much!! This fic will also take place during the 4 year timeskip after season 3, but then everything is different from there, obviously, haha.
Naturally, ponytail Armin is a MUST in my fics.... tiny or normal sized, heh.
I will be making more detailed explanation of Saving You soon, but, if you and others want to know more about ahead of time... I can make said post sooner than originally planned! Which is no problem :3
Thank you as ALWAYS for the lovely ask!! I cannot express it enough how much I appreciate you and other's questions! I'm so happy to answer each time x3. Please, be well and happy!! <3
#chatting with friends!!#mercutiothedestroyer#aruani#armin arlert#annie leonhart#aruani fic#aruani fanfic#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#aot#thank you sm for the ask!!
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hello!! i hope you're doing alright.so im asking for a really, really niche and specific sorta trope in a merthur fanfic where it's a merlin magic reveal, but before he reveals his magic, arthur absolutely hates on it? and when merlin reveals it, he feels so so bad. i don't know if there's a name for this trope 😭
also, my breaths are run by your compass. It was so good. I've reread it so many times already!! thank you for your beautiful writing.
hiya love! hmmm this is indeed a very particular trope (that i adore), but the problem is that it’ll be 100% reliant on my fish memory because no tags can refer to it. So I’ll rec you the ones on top of my head, and hopefully they’ll be close!
Arthur hates on Magic Pre-Reveal Fic Recs
1. A More Worthy King by @remuscariad (M) (WIP)
ik you’ll say where is the magic reveal, but trust me, as an insider to this fic, you will WANT to subscribe and wait for the magic reveal because it’s very close to what you’re looking for. This fic is the salvation for all the torment we’ve endured.
2. Don't Ask by @vensre (G) (>1K)
The simple definition of short but ninja. It’s not exactly what you’re looking for, but it’s brilliant, and it stabs your heart every time Merlin asks Arthur what would he do if Merlin was a sorcerer. You absolutely need to read it.
3. To you I swear my solemn oaths by regulusrules (G) (3K)
I would say this is a bit similar but like from afar. The context of Arthur hating magic right before the reveal is still in place, especially since it’s set right after Uther’s death. Bonus is Arthur feeling extra guilty because Merlin does give him the weapon to kill him.
4. A Prince's Tale of Cats and Warlocks by dornfelder (M) (12K)
I love this fic so much. Give me nonlinear narrative and I would always bow in appreciation. I love how it takes you on a journey of Arthur realising his guilt, and how he atones for it. It’s really good.
5. I am almost certain that @magicalmischel has a fic like this. She is one of the amazing writers in this fandom that writes most tropes beautifully. Help out with a rec from your fics, love.
Enjoy nonnie, and thanks for your kind words about MBARBYC!
#merlin#regulusrules recs#bbc merlin#merlin fic recs#merthur#ao3#arthur pendragon#merlin fic#king arthur#merlin bbc#regulusrules answers
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I absolutely loveddd your piece about iwtv! I feel like the characterisations of louis and armand were spot on, and as someone whose favourite character is armand, I'd love to see where the dynamic between him and reader is going👀
We all know armand loves a challenge *cough* daniel molloy *cough*. Do you think there's some sort of romance that could be simmering underneath his curiosity about reader?
i appreciate the characterization comment! i worked very hard on their voices!!
okay, i accidentally put so much thought into this in relation to armand's characterization/my interpretation of him, so this response is only thoughts on that. however, this did give me an actual idea for a fic in which armand is incredibly cutesy and manipulative to reader after she goes out without louis, so if you're interested in that pls let me know <33
disclaimer: a lot of this is based on how i see (show) armand, but the wonderful thing about media consumption is that people can see the same source material in different ways and i'm not claiming that my thoughts on armand (even in the context of bestie!reader verse) is the only viable way to see him :))
----
this is such an interesting concept and i've been thinking about it a lot.
it's also so cool that you brought up daniel bc i think one of the most important scenes for armand's characterization in the show is the fight in the 70's where armand is much more hurt by louis calling him "boring" than any mentions of his actual trauma.
to me, armand's such an interesting character bc he's an ancient, 514 yr old vampire whose so incredibly impressive, who doesn't need to make anyone look at him, who doesn't need validation, but he wants it, he'd never admit it, but that desire to be looked at and loved is so there.
i think louis, someone who armand really values, deeming reader as someone 'special' is enough to catch armand's attention (similarly to daniel) .
however, armand is being subjected to louis's love and interest in the reader much more consistently/openly than louis's relationship with daniel, which i feel like would only aggravate any subconscious insecurities on armand's end which would make him want reader's attention even more bc what could possibly make louis's 'special' human good enough to not want him??
this is such a side note, but i think it'd add such an interesting layer of tension if technically armand saw reader first. an 'origin story' i've been thinking about is armand and louis going to an art gallery, and armand seeing reader's painting, and then reader, and impulsively placing an anonymous bid for some crazy amount just for louis and reader to run into each other maybe an hour later and become besties.
okay, back to the main analysis--armand can't express his interest in reader too overtly bc louis would clock it immediately, so he'd be subtly manipulative by letting reader stumble dangerous situations just so he can be the hero, also i think he'd talk to reader about art to try to establish a connection/relationship outside of louis.
also once he's down this path he becomes almost overwhelmingly jealous (even though reader isn't with him in any capacity 🧍♀️). but bc he doesn't want to alert louis or shatter the carefully curated version of himself he's crafted for reader, he "punishes" her subtly.
his number one, go to way to hurt the reader for dating/upsetting him at all is to use louis against her. armand would plant the idea of reader falling in love with a human boy, settling down, and forgetting about louis to make louis insecure. this tension would eventually come up in front of reader, and reader would have to reassure louis and probably take a break from dating for a little.
armand would also be a little mean/snarky to reader after she goes out with others (romantically or platonically) in a way that makes him look like a concerned companion. you were out all night with some boy...and louis was left pouting in his coffin until sunset...how dare you leave them him? armand doesn't allow your friendship for you to hurt louis.
in this scenario, you might be wondering what armand's end goal is bc reader is much too loyal to be with louis's companion in any capacity, but i feel like this is something he's stumbled into accidentally and now it's a little too late. oh well, he deserves his matching set.
as this progresses, something armand swears is about simply proving that he can win reader over becomes less and less convenient. by that i mean that instead of getting reader wrapped around his finger, he's wrapped around reader's <33.
also, as a side note, i think if everything finally clicked for louis near the end of the interview, when their relationship is falling apart, he'd briefly be more worried for the reader's life than upset...and then maybe after dubai divorce armand threatens reader to hurt louis and louis is like 🧍♀️ she tells you she doesn't like your tone of voice and you change it you know damn well you're not touching a hair on her head unless it's to take her to the salon.
also another side note, i lowkey would love to find an excuse for daniel and reader to interact. it'd be a diva off for sure.
#i love analyzing characters <33#iwtv x reader#itwv x reader#armand x reader#louis de pointe du lac x reader#bestie!reader#this is almost a lore drop but not quite
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lmao #i didn't realize this word had made it to english or was translated to 'ramyeon sari noodle' #라면사리 literally does mean noodle x 2 but 사리 is specifically used for noodles you add to things that did not begin by having noodles #e.g. budae jjigae does not necessarily come with noodles but it is common to add it as extra #or when you're done with the meat portion of gamjatang they'll add either rice or ramyeon to the broth and refry it for you #the ramyeon used in that context is 'sari' #so it has more precise meanings than just noodle noodle #source: i'm korean
ahhh, ok. i appreciate the context! and yes, i seen someone say 'ramyeon sari noodles' in a review for ottogi ramyeon sari. so idk that it's quite made its way to english but its got its foot in the door.
you've heard of atm (automated teller machine) machine and pin (personal identification number) number, now there is ramyeon sari noodle. ramyeon is korean, comes from japanese ramen, from chinese lamian 'hand pulled noodles'. sari is korean for noodles. noodles is english for noodles. so it's hand pulled noodles noodles noodles.
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Image descriptions
- written by a visually impaired person
What is an image description?
an image description is exactly what it sounds like, a block of text describing the content of an image. this is important for many people but especially for blind and visually impaired people who cannot see the image (at least, not well enough to understand what's going on)
(people also cite that this helps people with slow internet, if you add that to this post I am hitting you on the head with a stick. our access to the internet is enough of a reason to add image descriptions, they don't have to help abled people as well.)
image descriptions serve the purpose of providing the same access to content and context in a post that you, a sighted person, have. the goal is to allow equal access for visually disabled people and other people who struggle to access images.
have you ever been stuck scrolling through Tumblr while images are refusing to load? was that frustrating? imagine how we feel every day, all the time.
How to write an image description
writing an image description is a skill. it's okay if you aren't great at it at first. not being great at it is not an excuse to not try. I'm tired of people telling me they can't be assed to try writing an image description because it might not be perfect. I would much rather read an imperfect image description than have no image description at all.
when you're describing an image the key point is to describe what's relevant, what you look at in an image. if the image is a tweet, describe what the tweet says. if the image is a picrew of an alter, describe what that alter looks like in the picrew.
You don't need to include every detail
a lot of guides will, with well intentions, tell you to describe a lot. sometimes, describing a lot is relevant. if you're describing a piece of art or photography then describing a lot is important because the point of the photo is to appreciate all of the photo. if you're taking a selfie, I truly do not care that your walls are blank and white. sometimes, more detail is less accessible. I don't want to scroll through paragraphs up on paragraphs for a photo that sighted people can just glance at and get the gist of.
take for example, this post divider I just used:
you could describe this as: a post divider with a large star in the center surrounded by a halo of the moon phase in gold. 2 horizontal lines come from it in the center with a pattern of alternating sun, moon, sun, and star symbols.
... that's really long. the point for sighted people is to break up the text with something pretty. it's not to admire all the intricacies of the image.
a more appropriate description would be: a star themed post divider
text, on the other hand, should always be transcribed in full. do not describe your DNI banner as "a DNI banner" that tells me nothing. put down all the text, all of it, because all of the text is relevant.
never use AI to write an image description! it's insulting and often inaccurate. problems with generative AI aside, throwing an image into chatGPT and then copy and pasting the sludge it spits out makes me feel like I'm not worth taking a minute to actually write an image description. AI generated image descriptions tend to be impersonal, inaccurate, and hard to follow because it just throws up all the random details it picks up on rather than describing the point of the image. with the editing required to fix a chatGPT image description you could have written your own and it would be better.
I truly cannot write an image description
ask for help. if you have no one you can directly ask, add a note to your post asking for help writing the description when you post it. when someone writes a description for you, copy and paste it into the original post. there is no such thing as image description theft, the point is accessibility. you can't steal accessibility. copy and pasting is not just okay it's encouraged!
on other people's posts (regardless of whether or not you can write an image description) you can often find image descriptions in the notes. taking a minute to check for image descriptions before reblogging an undescribed post is something fast and kind you can do for the people who need image descriptions. often you'll find a description and then hurray! that inaccessible post is now accessible!
....but I don't have any followers who need image descriptions!
yes you do.
if you truly don't it's probably because none of them can access your blog. fix that and suddenly you will have followers who need image descriptions
why is this in the pluralgang tag? none of you describe images.
Questions are encouraged
(if you have any)
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to the people commenting on my “classics” post referencing books and films i love: i am kissing you directly on the mouth. we shall have a spring wedding
to the people referencing books and films that are actively on my list but i haven’t gotten to yet: come back in one to twelve months and then we’ll talk
#pretty much everything people have referenced is in one category or the other it’s VERY funny#i’m AGGRESSIVELY taking it as validation for the strength of my reading list#i’m VERY proud of it and legitimately think it will help me a ton#and apparently dozens of commenters agree so !!!!!!#exciting!!#unfortunately the main thing people keep talking about is one of the later ones for the year#but it’s FINE#i have other things to do first#which will be just as important and helpful#and i will appreciate it more with that context#okay it’s time to READ MORE#330-something pages into this >600 page book that i WILL finish by the end of this week if it kills me#let’s GOOOOOOOOOO
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Alastor X Reader:
Context: When you discover it's Alastor's birthday, you want to suprise him with a thoughtful gift. But would it be one he'd like? And how would he show his appreciation?
Part 1/2
Shouting, swearing and things being thrown and broken had just startled you awake after a terrible nights sleep. Just like every other morning in the hotel. Why did Angel and Husk always have to be at eachothers throats? Just once, you'd like to wake up normally, without being disturbed. But, it wasn't like your afterlife was easy, it was hell. Groaning as you sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing the tiredness from your eyes, still hearing Angel and Husk argue like an old married couple.
"Uugghh, please shut up you two"
This was the 5th time this week they'd done this. They didn't listen to Charlie when she asked them politely to stop, well, with your eye bags and pounding headache, they were about to be asked in a more aggressive tone. Once you were dressed, you made your way down the hallway, with a face like thunder, not wanting them to fuck up your sleep anymore. When you reached the top of the main staircase, you see Angel and Husk at the bar, Charlie desperately trying to calm them down, Vaggie struggling to get Nifty down from the curtains, and Alastor is sat on the sofa with Lucifer and Pentious.
"Angel, come on, let's just go for a walk huh?"
"Why the fuck would I wanna do that Charlie?! I ain't leavin till Whiskers hear says sorry to me!"
"I already told you! Don't call me Whiskers!"
"Then don't call me fake you stupid moth'a-"
"SHUT UP!!"
You scream down the staircase, making everyone go silent. The only ones who look slightly impressed are Alastor, Lucifer and Vaggie.
"For the love of god! You guys haven't let me get a decent night sleep all fucking week! I don't care what started this stupid little argument, but it's ending now! And I swear, if you wake me up with this stupid little war of yours one more time! I'll shove a vodca bottle so far up your asses, you'll be tasting it for a month!"
"There uh, there ain't no need to be like that toots-"
"Oh really Angel? There isn't? Tell that to my fucking headaches! You've both been asked by Charlie nicely to stop, but neither of you listened. Well now, your getting it from me! Both of you, grow the fuck up!"
".............I'm sorry toots"
"...Yeh...sorry"
Angel and Husk both say, embarrassed and unable to look you in the eye, Alastor and Vaggie just chuckle under their breath.
"Good. Now, I suggest you both make yourself useful and help Charlie by doing that project she wanted you both to help her with"
"Aww! But toots-"
"(Sturn look, raised eyebrow)"
"A'right, fine. C'mon Husk"
Charlie looks so relived, she mouths the words thank you before taking Angel and Husk to the activities room down the hall. When they leave, you exhale, rubbing at your temples walking to the bar, and grabbing a drink. In fear of you still being angry, Vaggie, Nifty and Pentious slip up the stairs. Alastor on the other hand, stands up from the sofa, leaving Lucifer and sitting on the bar stool infront of you.
"Bravo my dear! I am rather impressed. I won't deny, I came very close to doing something along those lines myself. But you beat me too it! And dare I say, in a much more entertaining fashion"
"Those two have been driving me crazy! Charlie's sweet, but those two need something more firm"
"I absolutely agree. I must say, it was quite possibly one of the most enjoyable moments I've experienced for quite some time. Even more entertaining than when Charlie's little father came along"
"Eh! I'm not little"
"Aha! You keep thinking that"
Lucifer scoffed, turning away and playing with a little yellow duck in a kings crown.
"I say my dear, you do look rather exhausted. Might a nap be beneficial to you?"
"I would if I could. Even when I was alive, no matter how hard I tried, I could never nap unless I was ill or on holiday"
"Well, why not imagine your on your holiday?"
"Alastor, have you seen where we are?"
"Hm, quite right. You have a point. Ah well, at least you mother'd those two imbesils into stopping their squabbles. They shouldn't make that same mistake again, not if they want to remain unharmed"
"I'm not usually like that. Just with a lack of sleep, I don't know what came over me"
"Worry not my dear, all of us hear know your not a spiteful or nasty person. In fact, since I've known you, I have often wondered on many occasions, why you ended up in hell rather than heaven"
"That's a story for another time Alastor"
"Of course, I wouldn't want to cross your boundaries. Ah! Would you look at the time, I must take my leave. I have a scheduled time to see my good friend Rosie. You remember Rosie don't you?"
"Yeh, the nice overlord from Cannibal Town"
"That's her. I'll tell her you said hello. I do hope you have a pleasant day my dear. (Kisses your hand) And Lucifer...eh..."
Alastor flips Lucifer the middle finger as he leaves, pissing him off, his horns slightly showing when his eyes glow red. They're relationship was just as bad as Angel and Husk.
"Just ignore him Lucifer, he just wants to get a rise out of you"
"Yeh, well it's fucking working. Hey? You mind grabbing me a drink?"
"Sure, what are you having?"
"Uuuuuuuumm? I'll have an old fashioned. Oh oh! And can you put it in a wide glass? I wanna float my little ducky in there"
You giggle at his cute request, he loved his ducks. After making him a drink, he sits next to you too, floating his little duck in the drink with a giddy smile and big shiny eyes.
"Hey, can I just say, Alastor wasn't the only one who liked the way you spoke to those two"
"I kind of guessed you did. Your eyes were darting back and forth between me an them. Like a child trying to listen in on a conversation he's not supposed to"
"Can you blame me? Other than the red asshole who lives hear, your the only sinner I've seen who has the balls to raise your voice in the hotel. And heck! I remember seeing you have a shouting match with that overlord Valentino a few months ago too!"
"Yeh, well, he hurt Angel. I'll always protect my friends"
"I know. We all know that. I think that's why those two listened to you when you scolded them. Your their friend, but you can be a stern mother figure if needed to be"
"That's so weird, both you and Alastor both said the word mother, I honestly never thought that word would be used to describe me"
"Well, it is now. I think this place needs a motherly figure. Even if it's to stop the everyday chaos that happens in this place. I mean, you remember when Charlie made that birthday celebration for Nifty?"
"Oh hell yeah, I remember. (shudder) Nifty's birthday was the definition of disaster"
"Yeh, thank golly that only happens once a year. But then, Charlie wants everyone to celebrate their birthday down hear, and that's probably gunna be even worse"
"Well, I doubt Husk won't try dousing his birthday cake in bleach like Nifty did. Isn't is Husk who has a birthday next?"
"Hm? I have no clue. The calendars behind the bar"
You grab the calendar behind the bar, flicking through it as you lean on the counter, Lucifer playing with his little duck as you read.
"Hm? That's interesting. Turns out the next person to have their birthday is Alastor"
"What?! Why do we have to celebrate HIM?! He's such an ass! Every single time he's hear, he always does something to piss me off!"
"Not everyone in hear hates him Lucifer. I know you and Husk do, it's understandable why Husk does, and with you, I think he just enjoys making you angry"
"Who the hell does like him then?!"
"Charlie does. Nifty, Angel enjoys trying to get a rise out of him sometimes. I like him too"
"Why?! He's a dick!"
"He's a dick to you. He hasn't behaved that way with me since we've met. If anything, he's been a real gentleman"
"Yeh, gentleman my ass!......Although, you do kind of have a point. I've seen him be nice to Charlie and Nifty, definitely more with you. You never know, he may have the hots for you. Don't fall for his bullshit if he does!!!"
"Lucifer, relax. You do know Alastor's Asexual right?"
"Huh?"
"He's not into sex"
"Not into!!-How the hell can someone not be into that?! Sex is awesome! I mean, me and Lilith back in the day, eheh, bow chick'a wow wow!"
"That's you Lucifer. Not everyone can like the same things"
"I just didn't know that about him. Right! I'm gunna tear him a new one about it!"
"No"
"What?!"
"Your not gunna do that"
"But why not?! I'm the king of hell! I can do whatever I like! Why-why'd you say no?"
"Think about it Lucifer. You'll be lowering yourself to his level"
"Oh shit, yeh"
"And your own daughter said this hotel is about bettering yourself. Don't copy Alastor's behaviour, rise above it. Have you ever heard of the phrase, kill them with kindness?"
"Well yeh, but how can-oooooooooohhh! I see what you mean!"
"Anytime he wants to make you angry, be positive. Because in failing to wind you up-"
"It'll drive HIM crazy! Yes! I love it! Thank you sweetie"
"Don't mention it. And, don't give him something condescending for his birthday either"
"Not even a duck in the shape of a big-"
"I know what your about to say, and it's a firm no"
"Nnuugghh ok. I'll....be nice to him or whatever"
"Good. Hey? Did I just hear your name?"
"Hm? Oh, I hear it too. Sounds like Charlie. I'll go see what she wants. See you later Y/N"
"See you Lucifer"
You can't help but chuckle, watching Lucifer jump down and dance towards the hallway, little duck in hand. Now it was just you, in blissful silence, ah it was wonderful. You knew it wouldn't last long, but it's nice to have it while you can. As you enjoy the peace, you look back at the calendar, seeing Alastor's name written on the page. You did wonder to yourself, what he would like, or even if he wants a gift? And his birthday was happening tomorrow, it was time to have a think. Later that afternoon, Alastor came back from his morning with Rosie, and saw you sitting on your own in the hotel lobby.
"Good afternoon my dear! How has the day been for you?"
"It's been nice thanks, Pentious and Nifty came through a few times, but everyone else seems to be busy doing their own things. How was Rosie?"
"Ah she was delightful, a lovely morning was had by all, haha! (Sits down next to you) What are you reading?"
"This? It's The Great Gatsby"
"Ah! I read that book before I died! I do believe it was published about 10 years before I ended up hear. It was a great read if I remember correctly"
"Did you know they made a film of it?"
"But of course! In 1926"
"Not just in 1926"
"I beg your pardon my dear?"
"Yep. They made it into a film two more times. The second time in 1949, and again in 2013"
"I say! One might think they would like to leave a classic alone once it's been put on the noisy electronic box. But they truly did it 3 times? I never witnessed any of them myself. The book shall be my only knowledge of the classic tale"
"To be honest, you weren't missing anything. I saw the latest film before I died, but I wasn't a fan. I much prefer the books"
"Aha! And that is why I truly enjoy your company my dear. Ahh, I sometimes believe you are the only person in this whole building whose company I genuinely like"
"Really?"
"Of course!"
"That's so sweet Alastor, thank you"
"Don't mention it. Actually, now that I have you hear for a moment, I did have a subject I wished to bring up with you"
"Oh? What's that"
"It's something I was waiting the right time for. More specifically, a time where none else was around to listen in on us. As you well know, I like to keep my life private, unless I choose to share it"
"I do"
"Well......as you are aware, aswell as a few of the sinners in this hotel....my....passions....desires.....they are not.....exactly the same, as everyone else. Case in point, my desires are almost on the opposite spectrum of someone like Angeldust"
"Yes. I remember when you told me about that"
"And while I do not enjoy or wish to take part in any form of sexual affection....it does not mean I retain from all forms of showing my appreciation. I don't know if you were aware, of me kissing your hand goodbye whenever I leave your company? And noticed that I do not do that with any other lady"
"I...may have noticed, yes"
"Well, that is my way of showing my affection to you. But there are times, I wish....I wish for your hand...to be your lips...."
"Alastor...I'm flattered"
"Thank you....but my question to you is....is this feeling...reciprocated?"
"(Blushing, tucking hair behind ear) It might be"
"My darling, if it pleases you, I would never much like to show you how much you mean to me. But as you know, being the radio demon and a powerful overlord hear in hell-"
"You'd rather keep what might happen between us, private"
"Indeed. But please understand when I say, it is not that I do not wish to be seen with you in public as my partner, I very much do. But if Vox or the other V's see you at my side as my partner, you may be at risk of being targeted by them, and you may be in danger because of me. I need to make sure I am strong enough to protect you against any of the V's"
"It's ok, I understand. To be honest, I'm not one of those people who loves to parade around the streets with a boyfriend. I'd rather spend my time with them, enjoying their company"
"Absolutely! But I promise you this, if this is something you wish to be a part of, we will walk hand in hand, side by side after a sensible amount of time. Once I know I am strong enough to take on and win against all the V's, I will not have to worry about your safety. Because your safety, my dear... is my highest priority"
"That's very considerate of you"
"(Chuckles lightly)"
Alastor's smile looks genuine right now, you can tell by how gentle his eyes were. Taking your hand, he places a kiss on the back like he always does.
"Alastor?"
"Hm?"
"I think you have a new target....don't you think?"
".....Aahh....my pleasure my dear"
Feeling his fingers delicately hold your chin, he looks deep into your eyes. Looking desperately at your lips, but lovingly into your eyes. He leans in closer, you can almost feel his lips, so close-"
"Hi guys!!"
You both sit back a little, a little spooked by Lucifer barging through the hotel doors, loud and proud.
"Whatcha both up to?"
"We were enjoying a peaceful conversation before you very rudely interrupted us! One might say, it was very inconsiderate to barge in on someone's conversation, without adequate reason"
"Ah get over yourself! This hotel's a free place! And my daughter runs it, so yeh! Hey hey Y/N! Wanna see the new little ducky I made today! Look look!"
Lucifer bounds over to you and Alastor, but only speaks and looks at you.
"Isn't he just adorable!!"
"Well, yes he is Lucifer. But uh? Why does he have a bottle of whiskey?"
"That's because I'm making little ducks of everyone in the hotel! It was Charlie's idea, but I like it! This one's the bartender"
"You mean Husk?"
"Oh! That's his name! I keep forgetting-"
"Excuse me! If you wouldn't mind, me and Y/N were actually in the middle of a rather important discussion"
"Oooooh! I'm so scared! What are you gunna do? Talk me to death?"
"Something like that can surely be arranged-"
Very quickly, you intervene, standing between them both when Alastor stood up, eyes darkening, and Lucifer smirking.
"Woh woh woh! That's enough! Both of you!"
"My dear, if he insists on causing an issue, I am in more than happy to deal with it"
"Awww! Is someone a little tetchy? Knowing your becoming an old man getting to you huh?"
"What?! How did you know I am to be-"
"It's on Charlie's calendar, dipshit!"
"That's it-"
Again, having to push them apart, this time, Alastor really looked like he was going to attack Lucifer.
"Alastor! Alastor look at me!"
You say calmly, taking his face in your hands, making him look at you.
"Look at me. Take a deep breath, in....and out...in....and out..."
If anyone else had asked him to do that, or touched his face, he'd push back. But because it was you, he didn't mind, and it was genuinely calming him down, even his eyes had changed back from black to red.
"That's it. Ok, we can finish our chat another time, but for now, why don't you just take some time to calm yourself in your radio station? You've told me thats your happy place. Please Alastor, please don't let this escalate anymore"
"........Alright my dear.......I'll take some time.....I shall see you soon"
His shadow engulfs him, sending him up the stairs and on his way to the radio station.
"Ah man, can you believe that guy? He gets so-"
"You know what Lucifer? I can't believe you!"
"Wait, what?"
"Didn't listen to a word I said today? About not lowering yourself to that level? Not doing to him what he does to you?"
"But I-"
"But nothing! You agreed to have a better attitude when your around Alastor and you've just thrown all of that out of the window!"
"I can argue with whomever I want Y/N! I'm the king of hell after all!"
"And your in this hotel to support YOUR daughter! Have you forgotten that? Stop acting like a child and at least try to make something work with Alastor"
"Why? Because you'll be disappointed?"
"Because this is Charlie's dream! You can't see how hard she's working to actually help people, and instead of doing what a father should be doing, your picking fights with Alastor! Stop acting so childish and help you daughter! I shouldn't have to tell you that!"
You can't talk to him anymore, and storm up the stairs.
"But Y/N wait! I...I AM trying to help Charlie"
"Then pack in whatever this is with Alastor, or at least try. Because it's going to be Charlie who's going to be affected. Just think about that"
Lucifer just stood there, frozen, feeling guilty, because he knew you had a point about Charlie and how hard she's been working to make this hotel what it is.
You on the other hand, slammed your bedroom door shut behind you, running your hands though your hair, headache pulsating in your head. This place would drive you insane some days. You throw yourself onto your bed, snuggling up with your pillow, wanting just 5 minutes of peace. But again, you lived in a hotel with many others. Three gentle knocks came to the door.
"Nngguuhh! Please go away....."
"(Muffled voice behind the door)....Toots? It's me. Can I come in?"
His voice sounded so innocent, sweet. Normally, Angel would be all proud, sometimes seductive with the way he spoke, but this sounded genuine.
"Yeh. Come in"
You say, sitting up on your bed, seeing Angel enter your room with a little smile.
"Hey. How yah doin?"
"I've been better. I just can't shift this headache"
"Well hear. (He says pulling out a packet of paracetamol) Maybe these will help?"
He sits down next to you on your bed, handing you the tablets.
"Thanks Angel"
"It's no problem. Hey uh...I just wanna say sorry for the way I've been actin recently. I dunno, I guess Husk just brings out that side of me. I swear, I didn't know I was wakin yah up"
"It's fine Angel. I feel like I should say sorry too for the way I spoke to you and Husk"
"Oh no no toots! What you did was great!"
"Wait, seriously?"
"Hell yeh! Me and Husk both said it was like a moth'a tellin off her kids! And I think we both needed that. Honestly toots, you didn't do nothin wrong"
"Ok, that's a worry off my mind"
"Can I uh.....can I share somethin with yah?"
"Of course"
"Having someone moth'a me like that.....I actually liked it. Not cuz I'm into strong, independent women, well, I am but that's not the reason. Since I died, I hadn't really had that feelin of being around family, and well......my moth'a used to keep me and my sister from having fights like that too.....you kinda.....remind me of my mom"
"....I do?"
"Yeh....and it's nice. It feels like with you, I've got part of my family down hear that cares about me. I know that's probably stupid of me to say-"
"Angel. That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I feel honoured that you see me like that"
"(Sighing in relief) I'm glad toots. Thanks, for everything"
"Come hear"
You and Angel share a sweet and tight hug, all 8 of his arms held you.
"I'll always be hear for you Angel"
"So will I toots, I promise"
A good 20 minutes had passed, just chatting with Angel in your room. Talking about the afterlife, his fights with Husk, and you take some paracetamol in that time too.
"Hey toots! Have yah thought about what your gunna get smiles for his birthday yet?"
"I'm not sure to be honest. He's a tricky guy to buy for, I'm not sure if he'd even like receiving gifts"
"Well.....you could always.....wait in his room, wearing nothin but a little bow around your neck..."
"Angel! That's-wait? Why would you-"
"I maaay have been walking past the lobby when Alastor and you were talking"
"Angel"
"Don't worry toots, your secret's safe with me. But dayum babe! You've got the radio demon himself wantin yah! You've gotta admit, that's awesome!"
"It is lovely being around him, I can't deny that"
"So? You gunna take my advice?"
"I would, if Alastor was into that"
"Oh yeh! He ain't is he? Damn it. Well, I have no clue what to get him. I don't know him that well"
"I've been trying to think of things that would remind him of happier times, or his memories when he was alive. Something like that, but I've had no luck just yet"
"Hm? That's interesting. Wait! Didn't he live in new Orleans?"
"Yes! He did!"
"Sweet! I'll think of something to do with that! Listen toots, I've gotta go now, but I'll catch up with yah lat'ah"
"Alright Angel, see you soon"
When he left, you tried to have a good long thing about what to get Alastor for his birthday. He was sometimes fond of trinkets, eh, not good enough for a birthday present. Come on think. He enjoys his radio, taking long strolls through pentagram city, spending time in his room that's also part swamp-huh! That's it! Angel had a point about New Orleans, Alastor lived there, and you were the only one he confessed to about his life before he died. And he had the swamp in his room for a reason, to remember. The perfect idea came to your mind, and that was it, you knew exactly what to get him. Getting out your phone, you search for any place you can go to 'acquire' this suprise gift. Hm? The only place that could have some luck is in the Wrath Ring. Somewhere called Rough 'N Tumbleweed Ranch, well, it's better than nothing. The next day was Alastor's birthday. And down stairs in the lobby, you walk up to Charlie, who was bouncing with excitement.
"Oh hey! Hey Y/N! What are you up too?"
"Just on my way out to get Alastor his gift. What about you?"
"Ooooooh! Exciting!! Well, I'm just trying to plan the theme for Alastor's party tonight. I'm not quite sure what to go for. What do you think? (Shows you her note book) big blue and sparkles? Or big red and sparkles?"
"Umm, somehow, I'm not sure Alastor is a sparkles kind of guy"
"Yeh your right. Ugh, I just don't know what theme to do, I'm stuck"
"I know, why not do a 1920's theme? Get everyone to dress up in clothes from that time, and maybe serve his favourite food? Jambalaya. And don't forget, he isn't a fan of sweets, so he wouldn't eat a normal cake. Try putting a candle on a roasted duck? He's said before that he likes that meat, and carving a slice would probably make him happy. And maybe the party food could be similar to the 1920's too? Like deviled eggs, waldorf salad, dutchess potatoes, shrimp cocktail, canapes, olives, or maybe oyster rockefeller?"
"Yes yes YES!! Oh thank you Y/N, your a genius! I'm writing everything you've just said down! (Squeaks) This is going to be perfect! Thank you thank you!"
"I can give you a hand later, but for now, I need to get going"
"Yes! Of course! Go go! Me and the others can make a start on this party, thank you again Y/N! See you soon!"
"Bye Charlie!"
And with that, you were off. Leaving the hotel as Charlie bounds with joy in the background. Taking a walk to the streets, you flag down a taxi and give him the directions to the ranch you saw online. It was a fair distance away, but you were happy when you arrived there, seeing the sign as the taxi pulled over.
After paying, you headed in and looked around for anyone, apparently, this place was owned by an imp family, who had many things in and around their ranch.
"Hey there! Can I help ya'll?"
"Hi! I'm Y/N. I hope you don't mind the drop in, but I saw your ranch online, and see that you sell things to people who offer a good price?"
"Thats right, what're yah wantin today? We've got vehicles and animals available"
"Can I look at your animals please?"
"Sure thing darlin, follow me"
This lovely imp lady takes you to a fenced area, with 2 types of animals already.
"Hear yah go darlin, we've got horses and hogs hear, I'll haggle the price depending on which size you choose"
"These are lovely animals, but I was just wondering if you had something that prefers to stay close to water? Or swampy areas?"
"Ah! I hear yah. Let me take you to the edge of the ranch, we've got a few little critters back there for sale too"
A short walk later, a marshy tree covered green pond, that's also fenced in securely, seems to have many more animals.
"A'right, we've got Hattie over there. She's a water snake, a little bitey though. Over there we've got Wade, the snapping turtle. Be careful around him, he'll snap your fingers off before you can say fuck! And over there we've got Dutchess, she's actually just had a new litter of babies about 2 weeks ago. Their quite cute when they're youngens, and surprisingly easy to train. So all these little thangs are perfect for swampy areas, just take your pick"
"Would it be ok to buy one of Dutchess's babies?"
"Of course yah can! We've got little animal carriers too for yah to take one home. Ya'll fussed about the sex?"
"If it's possible, could it be a female?"
"Absolutely. She only had one boy outta 5 girls. Let me just grab one, yep, this ones definitely a girl. She's at least 2 pounds, and a healthy one too. I'll give her to yah for 200 bucks"
"Sold!"
Link to part 2
#alastor#alastor x y/n#alastor x you#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel x y/n#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel
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